bucket list

two years ago i put my bucket list online. i didn't spend too much time getting everything i wanted. and nor did i consciously set out to cross things off in the next two years, but it turns out that i have.

- go to spain to eat tapas and see gaudi, go to petra,

- get a pixi cut or shave head entirely

- go skydiving, cliff diving, scuba diving, snorkeling, swim with sharks and paddle in a glass bottom kayak

- go on a windmill tour (like this one), ride in a hot air balloon, more spelunking! ...well, more walking through caves anyway

- go on a cross country road trip

- learn to drive a motorcycle, go luge!!! (tho i may have to settle for skeleton)


- learn archery, rock climbing, knife-throwing, or how to throw a javelin

- at least once, watch all the current best picture nominations for an oscar

- see aurora borealis, watch a meteor shower

- make my own jam (it didn't turn out as jam, but i did make it!), make peppermint bark

- learn how to knit / crochet, use a potter's wheel, solder correctly, or weld

- build my own terrarium, make a quilt

myer's briggs

take the test here. what it's testing you on:

• How they focus their attention or get their energy (extraversion or introversion)
• How they perceive or take in information (sensing or intuition)
• How they prefer to make decisions (thinking or feeling)
• How they orient themselves to the external world (judgment or perception)

i'm an INFJ (tho i feel like i didn't used to be)

Introvert(22%)  iNtuitive(25%)  iNtuitive  Feeling(25%)  Judging(67%)
You have slight preference of Introversion over Extraversion (22%)
You have moderate preference of Intuition over Sensing (25%)
You have moderate preference of Feeling over Thinking (25%)
You have distinctive preference of Judging over Perceiving (67%)

wikipedia calls me a "Ethical Intuitive Introvert"

I – Introversion preferred to extraversion: INFJs tend to be quiet and reserved. They generally prefer interacting with a few close friends rather than a wide circle of acquaintances, and they expend energy in
social situations (whereas extraverts gain energy).
N – Intuition preferred to sensing: INFJs tend to be more abstract than concrete. They focus on the big picture rather than the details, and on future possibilities rather than immediate realities.
F – Feeling preferred to thinking: INFJs tend to value personal considerations above objective criteria. When making decisions, they often give more weight to social implications than to logic.
J – Judgment preferred to perception: INFJs tend to plan their activities and make decisions early. They derive a sense of control through predictability.

i'll leave it to you to judge if i am actually an INFJ, but i think it's pretty close.

xmas colors

 october 17th's astronomy photo of the day!

without china

what we'd wear if china didn't exist


went thru my current outfit and very surprisingly, i'd be wearing everything i'm still wearing!! i also included the brands i'm wearing and which country "owns" that brand. my list is surprisingly american. the one thing i'm wearing not from an american company is my watch, tho the only thing i'm wearing i know is made in america, are my bobby pins.

pj bottoms - india (old navy - american)
underwear - doesn't say (gilly hicks - american)
bra - phillipines (calvin klein - american)
tank top - doesn't say (gap - american)
shirt - nicaragua (gap - american)
seatshirt - vietnam (abercrombie & fitch - american)

bobby pins - usa (goody - american)
ring - doesn't say (coach - american)
watch - case, switzerland (swatch - swiss)

btw, it's funny but i thought gilly hicks was from australia, because it actaully says sydney on the tag. turns out they're owned by abercrombie & fitch, which for some reason i thought was a british brand.

how about you? anything surprising results?

crazy clouds

october 23rd's in canada

and november 4th's in washington

dragons

so this is the dragon that i was talking about in a previous post. so as i said, aj had been pestering me to come up with something for the auction. but we were both drawing blanks. so i went to joann, the craft store, and walked around waiting for inspiration to strike. i ended up in the felt aisle and decided to pick up needle felting again. i'd tried it years ago and had only made a couple things: a black and white sheep, a couple dinosaurs and a more intricate crocodile. i figured i had about a month to make something good. and if it wasn't good, i just wouldn't tell anyone about it!

it took about four days to make my first dragon. and holy shit i couldn't believe it when i was done! this literally came from one 8x11" sheet of blue felt, some left over red felt, thread, two seed beads for nostrils, and two "pearls" for eyeballs. i gotta say, i felt pretty fucking bad ass.

i emailed a photo to denise and said my dad thought he could mount it onto a wooden placard so it would be more trophy-like. she said that while it was very cool, they were all set for trophies for this year. maybe offer it up along with a trophy? i said no. haha. he's so special to me that i want him to be a highlight!! i didn't say that to her but i surely was thinking it :) so i said that i'd hold onto him for next year and make a red dragon, so we could have two, since a few of our prizes are paired.

four days later, i had made a red one. i also made the blue one more "chinese." i added eyeballs, horns, and the pearl in his mouth. i tried to make the red one's head more chinese too, but pretty much failed. blue's dad is a chinese lion; red's dad is an alligator. oh well. they do actually look very very different from each other, which is a shame, but each one has its qualities.

i didn't make the green one, obviously.

after making these tho i realized that hey, i finally have a great gift for dr. chen, mike, and mary! for sooo many years i've been wanting to get them something special as a thank you, but could never think of anything. i don't actually know them personally, and they all have money, so... but hand-made dragons would be great! they're from the heart and one of a kind. i'll photograph them when they're done sometime next year. :)

compton initiative

a few years ago ting and i tried to go to a habit for humanity meeting. i say tried because altho we really did show up to the right place at the right time, there was no meeting, and no one we asked had heard of said meeting. ... years later my neighbor debbie tells me about a volunteer project thru her church, seacoast grace. they go to compton and paint houses for people. i was so excited!

1/28/12 my first house

our first compton initiative project was just me and kim. i think debbie got sick? in any case, the house turned out good but on that day, when the paint was still wet, it looked pretty bad! the trim and house colors didn't have enough contrast so kim and i agreed that it had actually looked better before we started on it. =\ the above photo i actually took when we went back for our second project. i was surprised the colors really turned out so differently once the paint dried.

4/21/12 mckenna at our 2nd house

our 2nd project was a really hot day. debbie, mckenna, sally and i went (no kim this time). the ladies wanted to go gardening and they did an amazing job clearing up the backyard. i painted cause i hate spiders. :( we realized tho that both our houses were on the same street. that's kind of strange. especially strange because the area is so nice! when we thought of volunteering in compton we were thinking like... well, you know what we were thinking. but these houses were pretty nice to begin with! turns out that seacoast grace is partnered with a local church in compton. so when volunteering thru seacoast, our houses will always be in the same area. compton initiative itself rotates it's serving area for every project (4 districts total for 4 project a year).

5/12/12 serve day with ting

this school was a totally different project that ting signed us up for thru her church, rock harbor, called serve day. we got to choose which project we wanted to do so we picked painting a mural at a middle school in costa mesa. when we showed up, that wall was pretty much blank. the prep team had already stenciled out the center part of the mural, but everything still needed to be painted. the T's were also filled in later. this project might be one of my favorites because the change was so dramatic and the mural really did turn out so well!

10/20/12 house #3

for my third compton initiative project we brought a big group: kim, debbie, mckenna, sally, ting, aj, and his two friends. the weather wasn't great (it drizzled all day) but it was fun nevertheless. only hitch was that aj and his friends ended up at the wrong house, haha! this house was actually actually really cool because there was less window work (our first house just about killed us with all the latticework!) and because the before and after colors were so different: from grey to blue. i later got a photo packet from compton initiative which featured this house, probably because the change was pretty dramatic.

for 2013 i'm trying to set up an scdbc event with compton initiative on their 1/19 work day. i may even train to become a lieutenant, tho no promises yet since their schedule conflicts with lb competition dates. either way, i'm really hoping for a strong showing. i think it would be really great since we already have such a large group of people who are dedicated to giving up their every weekend morning. it would also be a good opportunity to meet people from other teams. send good thoughts my way!

atlas v

september 2nd's astronomy picture of the day!

dress code

last saturday i went to the space dragons year-end party. my first ye party was five years ago, and it was pretty small. we were all crammed into a restaurant, and there was no dj because there was no room for dancing. over the next few years our team has gotten larger, so we've moved into bigger venues. and a few years ago a part-time dj joined our team, so now he spins at our year-end dinners.

what's also happened is that a lot of masters (over 40 years old) have left the team, and a lot of under 30 year olds have joined. what does that mean? we're a stronger paddling team now, we have more socials, and our ye parties are less classy.

yup. less classy. it's not that we're classless. definitely not. but back in the day, women wore cocktail dresses and maybe even the occasional gown. this ye party was full of clubbing dresses: tight, short, and revealing.

i'm not passing judgement, because i totally dress like that too sometimes. but i do miss the ye parties where people looked nice, not just sexy. and the change does actually make me sad. ye dinner was the one time of year you could count on to play dress up, like how we used to do when we were kids. ..maybe it's just me wanting to feel like i'm at the grown up's party, but you can wear short and tight most any weekend, when do you have the chance to wear something actually nice?

i think a big problem is that most people no longer know the difference. image google cocktail dress and quite a number of the results you see are actually not appropriate cocktail party attire. good questions to ask yourself: is your dress more likely to be seen at a vegas club or at a formal wedding? on a d-list actress at a fro-yo store opening or on an oscar winner at a movie premier? would you wear this to see your in-laws or your sorority sisters?

anyway, no judgement. but next year i'm going to go with the crowd and wear something more casual and more sexy. and you know what? it won't be as fun.

holiday cards

i really wanted to do something for the space banquet this year. not sure why, but probably because aj had been bothering me about us offering something up for the action (but we couldn't think of anything), but also because i've been crafting a lot lately.

i had originally needle felted a dragon to offer up as a trophy (i'll post pictures of that later), but denise said they were all set for trophies. oh well. then about a week and a half before banquet, i was at michael's with g and saw that colored paper was on sale; 6 sheets for $1. so i decided i'd give paper cutting a try.

and those are the results. pretty good if i do say so myself!! the last colored sheet we bought was a light grey, so the white design did not look good on it, so instead of making 12, i made only 11, then discarded the one i felt was "worst." i figure a set of 10 cards makes more sense than 11. i also purchased plain white envelopes to go with the cards. (tho i totally didn't think to do so at the time!)

making these were easier and harder than i thought, haha. i had went to target a couple times to get desgin ideas for the cards so that part wasn't too bad. turns out that the hardest thing is drawing! even if you do have an  idea, the pencil marks have to be light enough so that they'll erase cleanly. the design also has to be drawn on backwards since i cut from the back. once i realized i would never be able to finish without some help i asked ting to draw a few for me. she "free handed" the snowman and the stockings, and also drew the wreath and "be merry" from a few pictures i had taken at target. she really adapted them to make sense with the paper cutting though and i definitely think the ones she drew turned out to be some of the best of the set. (btw, i did draw the deer and the holly ones. but before you give me too much credit, i copied those designs, haha. [i tell you this because rip didn't believe that i did the deer one myself. which i kind of didn't!]).

btw, the guy who ended up winning these cards, i don't think was too excited about them. it was a mass raffle pot instead of people putting in tickets for specific items they actually wanted. oh well. either way, i gave something to the team, tried out a new craft, and made something pretty nice too.

1min history lession

http://apod.nasa.gov/apod/ap121114.html

not photoshop!

october 3rd's astronomy picture of the day!

they call it a goat aurora but i think it looks more like a dragon head. :)

guava jam

i've been in a "crafty" mood lately, so when my dad and i picked like 40 pounds of guavas from our other house, i decided to make guava jam!

in trying to find a recipe, i found out that jam and jelly are different. jelly is made from the juice while jam is made up of the flesh of the fruit. and marmalade includes the rind. ::cue music:: the more you know!

i used this jam recipe. tho i was also kind of looking at this jelly recipe also. i mostly followed the recipe but balked at putting in that much sugar. dumb me thought "well, i like sour anyway!" 

it started out okay, but the stuff was just so watery! even after an hour of simmering to help evaporation it looked more like apple sauce than anything. i mean, it tasted good. really good, but it clearly wasn't the right texture.
 
after some research, i found out that sugar isn't just for taste! most jams require pectin to help it gel. guavas naturally have a lot of pectin, so the recipe didn't require any to be added. but sugar also helps set jams (so does the lemon juice, btw). so including only half the amount of required sugar meant that no amount of simmering was ever going to get it to set. doh!

so in hopes of fixing my jam, i went to target and picked up a box of pectin. i followed the recipe and crossed my fingers. the next day (you have to give it 24 hours to set after adding in pectin), i opened up a jar to see... no change at all! :( it still had the exact color and consistency of apple sauce.

i ate it anyway.

next time tho, i follow the recipe. haha!  

wandering beauty

august 24th's astronomy picture of the day!

for what?

this general david petraeus scandal is just... sad. it's yet another in a looooooong line of men cheating on their wives. respected men who have a lot more to lose than the average philandering spouse. which brings up the question, "so why do they do it?" ...which is a question i'm not going to answer. ha! but a lot of people use these few cheaters as a tally mark against men in general. many people think that women in high positions would not cheat on their spouses. and lots think that simply because they believe that women don't care about sex as much as men do. i don't know if that's true. but i do think that the reason more men cheat (assuming that actually more cheat, and not just that more are caught) has a lot more to do with biological factors.

it's harder for women in power. it's harder for them to get there and it's harder for them to stay there. for many women who get promoted to high positions, there's always the question of "who did she sleep with to get that raise?" or "is she really the best candidate or is this an affirmative action thing?" who's going to ask that of a man? especially of a white man? any woman who has risen the ranks has dealt with her share of sexual harassment. so any woman tempted by having an affair would probably think harder about it than a man would.

love quotations

"i'm selfish, impatient, and a little insecure. i'm out of control and at times, i'm hard to handle. but if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best." - marilyn monroe

"if you press me to say when i loved him, i can say no more than because he was he, and i was i." - michel de montaigne

"what i want is to be needed. what i need is to be indispensable to somebody. who i need is somebody that will eat up all my free time, my ego, my attention. somebody addicted to me. a mutual addiction." - chuck palahniuk

"two people can be perfect for each other but if the timing's wrong, it's never going to work out. bad timing is the reason that most normal people end up single. Weirdos and creeps are single 'cause they are weird and creepy, but people like us are single because of bad timing." - love and sex

blue moon

september 1st's astronomy picture of the day!

quotations

lol, every time i say i'm going to start blogging less, i don't!

"all god does is watch us and kill us when we get boring. we must never, ever be boring." - chuck palahniuk

"be yourself; everyone else is already taken." - oscar wild

"you have enemies? good, that means you stood up for something, sometime in your life" - winston churchill

 "courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear. the brave may not live forever, but the cautious do not live at all." - ambrose redmoon

 "We sleep safe in our beds because rough men stand ready in the night to visit violence on those who would do us harm." -George Orwell

we're all delusional!

a must read. seriously. it's hilarious! Men and Women Can't Be "Just Friends"

"...men’s estimates of how attractive they were to their female friends had virtually nothing to do with how these women actually felt, and almost everything to do with how the men themselves felt... men consistently overestimated the level of attraction felt by their female friends and women consistently underestimated the level of attraction felt by their male friends." i can't tell you how true this rings to me. haHA! rip thinks almost every girl likes him that way. even my friends. friends with whom i have confirmed that they have never liked him at all. he thinks they're lying. it's madness! i almost never think it anymore. maybe i'm too self-absorbed to notice the "signals"? and when the occasional guy does express attraction, i'm always like "what?! where did this come from?"

"Although men were equally as likely to desire “romantic dates” with “taken” friends as with single ones, women were sensitive to their male friends’ relationship status and uninterested in pursuing those who were already involved with someone else." this one is really interesting. i've had a couple guys tell me that they would "wait for me" or something nutty like that. i've never felt even vaguely inclined to say that to someone. i've never even thought it. he's taken. i'm moving on. duh.

"These results suggest that men, relative to women, have a particularly hard time being “just friends.”" which is why rip pretty much hates every new guy friend i make because he thinks they're all attracted to me. and i am always shocked when they actually are! and also why i've always been right about those couple girl friends of his i was worried about. though apparently i should have been worried about all of them!

"Males were significantly more likely than females to list romantic attraction as a benefit of opposite-sex friendships." not sure what to think about this one. probably because i wouldn't list it as a benefit, lol. we are our stereotypes!!

infinity!

september 22nd's astronomy photo of the day!

halloween

it goes without saying that i have a huge problem with unnecessarily slutty halloween costumes. there's a pretty funny tumblr called "fuck no sexist halloween costumes" that has side by side comparisons of some costume ideas.

but i'm actually blogging about the video clip from abc's "what would you do?" if you're too busy/lazy to watch the 7+min clip, you can see the gif summary here.

rip and i talked about something similar, which i blogged about. i'm not going to go into detail about how i feel and why (since my opinions haven't changed), but i wouldn't have too big of a problem if my kids wanted to cross dress for halloween. i myself did it in high school for god's sake.

i know nothing!

Italy Finds Scientists Guilty Of Manslaughter For 2009 Earthquake Forecast
and
Italian Scientists Sentenced to 6 Years for Earthquake Statements

this is CRAZY. scientists can't predict earthquakes. and the committee did not say that they could either. they also didn't deny that there would be earthquakes. they only said that it was "unlikely." true, they probably shouldn't have gone even that far but to be sued and convicted! this is madness!

related article: Shaky Ground: Can Seismologists Be Charged with a Crime for Not Predicting Deadly Quakes?

self-portrait

september 18th's astronomy picture of the day!

over-nutrition

just finished michael pollan's the omnivore's dilemma. and while there were a LOT of interesting things. this one stuck out to me:

"the disease formerly known as adult-onset diabetes has had to be renamed type II diabetes since it now occurs so frequently in children." (102)

also: "...the united nations reported that in 2000 the number of people suffering from overnutrition--a billion-- had officially surpassed the number suffering from malnutrition--800 million." (102)

related video on the pasture-raised chickens.

animal testing

fedex and ups commit to not ship research animals

yes, maybe "most invasive chimpanzee research was scientifically unnecessary" but is most non-invasive animal research unnecessary as well? i'm against testing on animals for things like cosmetics. but what's the alternative for testing on them for serious things like medicines? testing on people. and i'd much rather scientists test on animals than on people! i get that animals can't give consent, and that people can, but i also feel like most human research volunteers aren't doing it just to further scientific or medical progress or whatever. most likely, they need the money. and i don't think exploiting the poor is an acceptable alternative to testing on animals.

bungle bungle!

september 11th's astronomy picture of the day!

catalina

much earlier this year rip messed up and i asked him to make it up to me. anything he wanted. whatever he thought was appropriate. he decided on a trip to catalina (cause we had bought groupon boat tickets earlier). of course, there was more drama before we went (like when and why we were going at all). but eventually we went a couple weekends ago with g and her husband. ...i know. i actually hadn't given it much thought, but t brought it up "wasn't supposed to be just you and him?" and yeah, it was. but i guess i figured that if we didn't go with g and bill, and soon, we probably just wouldn't and g/bill prob wouldn't either and we'd all end up wasting out tickets. anyway. it was fine. i mean, i don't know that i would really count this as "making it up to me" since it was mostly g and i that made it happen, but oh well, he's been pretty great lately.

descanso beach

after we got to the island we had lunch and walked around a bit. then we went kayaking starting from descanso beach. no pictures tho, since we didn't have a waterproof camera. :( which is a real shame cause the water is crazy clear! the scenery wasn't very varied, but it was nice to get out onto the water and be able to see the island from another perspective.

very few cars, mostly golf carts

later g and i went snorkeling in lover's cove while rip and bill stayed on shore. she had done it before and i was very excited to try it (it's on my bucket list, after all). i actually had a terrible time of it. rip had warned me about it before but i figured that since i'm a mouth breather anyway it would do okay. what i didn't realize was that it wasn't so much the physical part that was hard, it was the mental aspect. altho i knew it was totally safe, i just could not get over the fact that i was breathing underwater! it didn't help that for the first 10minutes or so i wore the mask wrong. i hadn't really looked that mask so i wore it like a ski mask, above the nose. rip eventually pointed it to me that i was supposed to wear it over the nose. even later after that, annie showed me how to get a good fit on the goggles. they still leaked a little, but it was much better.

now that i was wearing my equipment properly i had a physically easier time of it. but mentally i still couldn't quite get the hang of it. eventually i ended up swimming with my fingers on the lenses of my goggles, which helped. i think maybe so i wouldn't "forget" i was wearing a snorkel. i also tried to stay near people cause that made me feel more comfortable. even so, i would was still hyperventilating and screaming every time a wave came over me or when fish got too close (some big ones had pretty scary sharp teeth!). lol. even tho i didn't have a particularly good time, i would definitely do it again. the scariness is all mental, so it was worth it to see the fish in their "natural environment".

view of the casino from descanso beach

the next day we went on a bus tour that took us up thru the mountains and to the airport. we saw a few buffalo and watched an airplane take off. i like that catalina (well, avalon anyway, which is the main [only?] city on the island) is so small. i did everything i wanted to do, and didn't feel rushed at all.

after we got back we went to flemings for their happy hour and rip finally had their amazing burger. a great closer to a very relaxing two days.

pre-natal decisions

warning: genetically modified humans

"...human pre-natal diagnosis... The object of the exercise: to identify foetuses with the earmarks of genetic disease as candidates for abortion."

rip and i talked about this the other month. we agreed that if we knew our kid was going to have a major mental or physical disability we would most likely choose to abort it. reasoning: "growing up is hard enough. i wouldn't want my kid to go through more discrimination / bullying / hardship if he had no arms or some sort of major mental handicap."

one of us then asked what we would do if we knew the kid was going to be gay? i said i'd keep it, rip said he would have to think about it. i was offended. but after thinking about it, i now see how hypocritical that is. being gay is hard. in america most of us don't worry about getting killed just because we're a certain ethnicity (it does happen, but not often enough to be really worried about). but being gay is dangerous. crazy haters will make my kid's life miserable just cause he likes boys instead of girls. so if my reasoning for not wanting a child with harlequin ichthyosis is that i want my kid's life be "easy" doesn't that mean i should also not want my kid to be gay? but how far does this go? (and yes, i know i'm approaching, or maybe even on, a slippery slope here...) should i also not want to have girl?

it's hard to be a parent. good parents want whatever's best for their child. but what's "best" isn't always clear.

monument valley

august 1st's astronomy photo of the day

sf

backdrop to the races. pretty nice, no?

went to sf a few weeks ago with the team. then stayed a few days afterwards to hang out with chang. a few highlights of the trip:

gangnam style costumes

twas pretty cold there!

1. i actually cried after a race, which i've never done. i was stroking white boat, which was full of newbies. newbies tend to get excited during races and lose control, which is exactly what happened in our first three races. after the start we'd be in the top three and over the next 400m we'd drop to like last place (out of six). it was heartbreaking because it was no one's fault but our own! it was incredibly frustrating to me because even the other stroke was rushing me during each piece (i was lead stroke). for our finals race, most of us switched sides, so the other stroke was then on her "on" side and was lead since i was now on my off-side. and guess what? the whole boat kept it together and we finished in 3rd! :) i was just SO happy that we finally got it together for our finals race that i cried after. hahah. pretty crazy.

at black sands

i couldn't roll up my skinny jeans, so i just took them off!

2. annie and i went to many new places: black sand beach, chapel of the chimes (which was designed by Julia Morgan [she did hearst castle too]), mountain view cemetery, and point bonita. i love that every time i go to sf i see new things. eventually i'll do golden gate park. 

at the chapel. those "books" are actually urns!

not the only pyramid. and certainly not the fanciest mausoleum.

a few other fun things worth mentioning, but not worth going into detail about: space taking the tourney (finishing an amazing season where we took every tourney we were in [minus portland, which doesn't count cause that was a roving tourney]), gangnam style flash mob, drinking (not drunking!) 7 days in row which beats my old record by ~4 days, eating lots of good food (charcuterie, fried crawfish, also sea urchin for the first time...), discovering the panoramic function on my cell camera, scaring off the gay couple having sex at black sands (which is a nudist beach, btw. but anyway, underwear is like bikini bottoms, there was no one there, and my jacket pretty much covered everything).

otw back from point bonita lighthouse (which was closed)

cali stats

joan didion - where i was from

"As recently as 1993, eighty-two thousand acres in California were still planted in alfalfa, a low-value crop requiring more water than was then use in the households of thirty million Californians. Almost a million and a half acres were planted in cotton, the state's second largest consumer of water, a crop subsidized directly by the federal government. Four hundred thousand acres were planted in rice, the cultivation of which involves submerging the fields under six inches of water from mid-April until August harvest, months during which, in California, no rain falls. The 1.6 million acre feet of water this required (an acre foot is roughly 326,000 gallons) was made available, even in drought years... Ninety percent of the California grain was glutinous medium-grain Japonica, a type not popular in the United States but favored in both Japan and Korea, each of which banned the import of California rice." (25-26)

"It was in 1993 when the California Department of Corrections activated its first "death fence," at Calipatria. It was in 1994 when the second "death fence" was activated at Lancaster, carrying a charge of 650 milliamperers, almost ten times the voltage required to cause instant death... It was also in 1994 when standardized testing of reading skills among California fourth-graders placed them last in the nation, below Mississippi, tied only with Louisiana. It was in 1995 when, for the first time, California spent more on its prisons than on its two university systems, the ten campuses of the University of California and the twenty-four campuses of California Sate University." (187)

moon meets jupiter

july 20th's astronomy photo of the day

will food for paddle

so annoyed. earlier this year the scdbc put on our inaugural la dragon boat race. most of the teams competing were random community teams. however, there was also a "Best Twelve" category, which was reserved for year-round teams like space dragons, guppies, etc. all the big teams (except space) in lb sent a boat or two. (lard sent three). why? cause there was a cash prize! 1st - $800, 2nd - $500, 3rd - $300. registration was $300. since space is having an amazing season, and the races were only one day, and not far, we were guaranteed to win money. we might not have won first (la races were on 10man boats) but, and i'm not at all being conceited here, space would've at the very least earned our registration money back (if we sent only one boat).

we didn't go because there was "not enough interest." ...tho i'm sure had the captains emphasized that we were pretty much guaranteed to win a cash prize, we would've gone. why? because we paddle anyway. why not paddle for money?

i get the the weekly space newsletter today and now they are asking for people to randomly donate money to the team because we're now a 501(c)(3). they've also announced yet another fundraising event: working the concession stand at the rose bowl. we've always done a garage sale, and in more recent years we've added a bake sale. this year we've also done a restaurant thing, and now this random selling food shit. ...wtf?

this is a dragon boat team. we paddle. that's the whole point. but when we're invited to paddle for get "free" money, we say no. instead we decide to sell food. i get that everyone eats but... this team's staff is so fucking ridiculous sometimes. i've had a lot of fun this year, at tournies, practices, getting to know people, blahblahblah. but some of the admin's decisions are just... they make no fucking sense. it's enough to make you want to quit the team! oh, right, that is the reason i want to quit. (btw, there's MUCH more than just the la race thing but i'm so tired of thinking about this team's fucking staff...)

chris brown

Laura Bates - Chris Brown's Tattoo Shows Exactly How Seriously We Take Domestic Violence

a. is it really a picture of a battered woman?
b. how long do wait to forgive someone of battery?
c. should we forgive chris brown?

a. i say no. it immediately reminded me of the day of the dead skull things. and his rep says it is based of a sugar skull design. 

b. not for a very very long time. i think this is one of those things that your reputation can never / probably should never really recover from. it's like being a rapist or a child molester. can you wish you never did those things and would never ever again? sure. but that stuff's really bad. it's not like making a simple wrong decision, like shoplifting.

c. in brown's case, definitely not yet. he beat up rihanna really really badly. he strangled her, hit her, and did not stop. and this all happened only three years ago. since then he hasn't shown remorse ("It's not really a big deal to me now, as far as that situation. I think I'm past that in my life." ""I'm so over people bringing this past s**t up!!!" [...yes, because your feelings matter, not that of your victim.]). and he clearly still has an anger problem (last year's incident at gma, this year's fight with drake).

just because rihanna clearly seems to have forgiven him doesn't mean that the rest of us should. maybe she's really goddamn stupid. maybe he lies to her and she's bought it. maybe he does feel badly about the situation and has managed to hold on his anger (for now?). maybe he really has changed. or maybe not.

in any case, the thing that really bothers me is that brown himself seems to think that just because some time has passed, and that rihanna has forgiven him, nothing else matters. but what he did was really terrible. and he's a public figure so he does have to make it up to his fans. btw, time itself doesn't mean anything. just cause it's been three years (which is not even a long time) doesn't mean that you're automatically forgiven.

auroras

july 25th's astronomy photo of the day!

(mouse over photo on linked site for constellation map)

child abuse?

Is Having Obese Children Child Abuse?

at first i was inclined to say no, but upon reading the article... i mean, shit, a 90lb 3yo or a 400lb 12yo? that's crazy! the sad thing tho, is not just that these kids are overbese (my term for not just obese, but way over it, like 50% body fat), but their parents are probably too. and they basically cannot lose the weight. either they don't know how, or they don't have the financial / emotional support to lose that much. losing over even 50lbs is a commitment, and it's a whole lifestyle change. that's hard!

i feel like in most child endangerment cases the parents know it's bad, but can't be bothered to care. having your kids do drugs or drink, drop out of school, become a ho, join a gang... a lot of the parents are doing the same thing. and a lot of them, don't see anything wrong with it. it seems a bit ineffectual to take the kids away only to send them back later. what's the point, really? they'll just fall back into the same lifestyle because that's what their parents are doing.

i guess part of the reason you take the kid away is to scare the parents into making the necessary changes. most parents love their kids and would do most anything to get that kid back. ...you'd think anyway. g is a lawyer representing some parents who had their kids taken away. and while they do want their kids back, sometimes... they just can't overcome their problems. i wonder if there's a better solution...

mars volcano

july 12th's astronomy photo of the day!

re-writing

Why Are People Still Having Weddings at Plantations Slaves Built?

this reminds me of the huckleberry finn controversy. and i wonder if people aren't a bit too sensitive about this? yes slavery is bad, most everyone recognizes that. but it's not as though if you have a wedding at a slave-built plantation, you're celebrating slavery. and if that were actually the case, we probably shouldn't have anyone living in the whitehouse either, cause that too was built by slaves.

slavery is an ugly part of our history. but it's not as if we can (or even should) forget that it happened. our country and culture is better for the contributions of the people who came over as slaves, or who are descended from. and no, you idiot, i'm not saying saying slavery was awesome or that only good things came out of it. but it did happen. so short of tearing down everything that was built by slaves, erasing all the music that stemmed from spirituals, actually re-writing all our history books, and everything else crazy, let's just agree that it was terrible and that we'll never do anything like it again.

as that saying from george santaya goes: those who cannot remember the past are doomed to repeat it.

sex strike

The Crossed-Legs Tactic: When Does It Make Sense to Go on a Political Sex Strike?

"But does abstinence ever make sense as a protest? And are the women who adopt this strategy ultimately undercutting their own political power?"

"At face value, this political tactic is as old-fashioned as it gets. It paints men as horny brutes and women as sacrificial gatekeepers. Sure, boycotts always involve self-denial, but the tone of a sex strike is never mutual sacrifice. It's women fighting against a male-dominated group that they feel they can't control except with their bodies. The basic assumption is that men are so dependent on boning that they'll crack at the slightest deprivation of sexual activity."

i'm think sex strikes are generally a publicity thing. nothing grabs headlines quite like sex. but i think one should only deny sex if it has to do with the issue they're striking over.

"Consider Second City's call earlier this year to stop fucking men who support defunding Planned Parenthood. Their logic was simple: men who don't think women's access to health care is important didn't deserve to have sex with women. This wasn't a call for women to abstain from sex in general—just to deny it to men who didn't care about their rights."

see, that example makes sense. denying sex to get roads fixed? ...not so much. and since it doesn't make sense, it undercuts your mission. 

teimareh petroglyphs

july 12th's astronomy photo of the day

crazy beautiful, no?

haircut

it's been about two years since my last haircut, and you know that means! i should've waited longer this time but t was getting her hair cut at the salon we went to last time so i decided to tag along. next time i know, two years minimum waiting time. also, i'm actually really sad cause the length i got it cut at is my favorite length: just about mid-boob.

the cut is definitely a little shorter than i was expecting (rip says the photo looks longer than irl), but as the stylist was about to cut it, i was worried it might not be long enough, so i told her take as much as she could. of course, she still needed a few inches to work with during styling, so my ponytail came in only a little bit over 10". eeck! which is why this time instead of donating to locks of love (10" minimum) i'll be giving it to pantene's beautiful lengths program (8" minimum).

anyway, i hope i get some sort of acknowledgement of my hair being put to good use. last time, locks of love mailed me a postcard with a really creepy photo a few weeks after i sent in my hair, lol.

spoiled

why are american kids so spoiled?

i definitely think we coddle our kids. i've tutored a few kids over the years and have seen what some parents let their kids get away with... sheesh! also, since i do the steering stuff at long beach i'm constantly emailing teams. a lot of these are high school or college teams, and they are generally pretty SHIT at responding to emails. it's not like they're not online, they just don't respond to emails because they don't think it's important. that's a ridiculous attitude!

i definitely think it's "our" fault tho. i remember back in the day when we were a high school or college team, we were on top of things! we were self-taught. we coached ourselves, set up our own practices, figured out our own finances, got to practices / races on our own, turned in paperwork without needing reminders... all of the high school teams now all have an adult coach / team manager. why is that? we did it ourselves, why can't they?

"...my husband and I gave them a new job: unloading the grocery bags from the car. One evening when I came home from the store, it was raining. Carrying two or three bags, the youngest, Aaron, who is thirteen, tried to jump over a puddle. There was a loud crash. After I’d retrieved what food could be salvaged from a Molotov cocktail of broken glass and mango juice, I decided that Aaron needed another, more vigorous lesson in responsibility. Now, in addition to unloading groceries, he would also have the task of taking out the garbage. On one of his first forays, he neglected to close the lid on the pail tightly enough, and it attracted a bear. The next morning, as I was gathering up the used tissues, ant-filled raisin boxes, and slimy Saran Wrap scattered across the yard, I decided that I didn’t have time to let my kids help out around the house."

...did you notice anything wrong with this? she cleaned up after he messed up. your kid is 13; he can pick up broken glass without bleeding to death. and if he does get hurt, it probably won't be badly, so it's not a big deal. (it's good though that they didn't take away the unloading task) aaron wasn't careful when doing his chores, but if he doesn't have to deal with the consequences, he'll never learn to be more careful. why should he care if bears get into the garbage? mom will clean it up anyway.

i'm not saying that you should make your kids grow up as fast as possible (tho it seems they can handle it), but you shouldn't coddle them. teach them to be independent. supervise, but don't do it yourself. let them figure it out first before telling them what to do. your kid is smarter and more capable than you think.

sunspots & silhouettes

july 4th's astronomy picture of the day.

posting

posts here are going to get a little further apart. i've run out of things to write about.

owls

stacey o'brien - wesley the owl: the remarkable love story of an owl and his girl

"...owls mate for life, and when an owl's mate dies, he doesn't necessarily go out and find another partner. Instead, he might turn his head to face the tree on which he's sitting and stare fixedly in a deep depression until he dies. Such profound grief is indicative of how passionately owls can feel and how devoted they are to their mates." (3)

"The evidence that all species of animals with a brain have emotions is overwhelming... People who work with reptiles are well aware of the risk of depression in captive snakes and lizards of all kinds. Turtles and tortoises re especially prone to it. If a snake gets depressed, his life is immediately in danger, as he will stop eating. I once rescued a snake that had to be tube fed for a year before he began to eat on his own again, after having an owner who did not provide proper stimulation for him. Snakes will also stop eating if they have a traumatic event with a mouse. Reptiles are cold blooded, meaning that they cannot control their own body temperature and are dependent upon their environment to provide a hear source. If they cannot raise their temperature, their metabolism becomes so sluggish that they cannot defend themselves against even a mouse. Careless snake owners have been known to toss a mouse in with the snake and not supervise. If the snake is cold, the mouse can eat the snake alive and the snake can't respond. If the snake survives such an episode, it will have such a fear of mice that it will no longer eat. It can take up to a year of tube feeding before the snake against the courage to face another mouse...

"Lack of stimulation affects brain growth... The difference between a rat with a wide variety of toys and one with no toys can be seen with the naked eye during an animal autopsy (a necropsy). The rat with the toys will have a brain just packed with ridges and wrinkles, which indicated more neural connections, while the rat with no toys will have a relatively smooth cortex because he lacked the stimulation needed to devlop neuronal (nerve cell) connections in the brain..." (47-48)