2021 donation list

well damn, kind of also no food orgs this year! (the united farm workers is a worker's right org, not a food org.) altho i did volunteer at the food bank a handful of times, AND i got my dad to donate to the oc food bank. what's more, last time, debbie, kim, and tiffany went to volunteer with us, and I'm recruiting my dad to go with us in january!

january - national parks service
february - west street recovery
march - water stations
april - carlos' gofundme
may - pro publica
june - american rescue league (poorly drawn pets)
july - united farm workers
august - eddy's venmo, kiva
september - moore institute for plastic pollution research
october - compton pledge
november - dress for success miami
december - planned parenthood

collection drive - digital cameras for project kare. unofficially I also did usb power banks for angela (the homeless lady in our neighborhood), i've also collected clothing for her throughout the year. 

priority orgs for next year: NPR, PBS, Vox, solarbuddy.org, abortionfunds.org, RIP medical debt, Food Finders, Harvest Partners, Food Forward, Seed Savers, safe toddles, Anti Recidivism Coalition (i found out about them thru their the ride home program), also hopefully I'll be able to do operation santa next year!

donate early

a tip for donating at the end of any year: donate early! especially if you're donating a significant amount. non-profits do year-end thank you campaigns, so donating early means that we don't have to rush on Jan 1st to add you to our thank you 20-- donor social media list, and thank you letter, and all the other random things that we get busy with.

so donate early! if you want to wait until the end of the year to see how much you can afford to give, try to donate before christmas as many non-profits take the week between christmas and the new year off. :)

december 2021 donation

this month I donated to planned parenthood because of all the good work they do. I went to them when I didn't have healthcare and was able to get on the pill, and yeah, I've also gotten an abortion there too. 

so thank you planned parenthood for allowing me to not derail my life by being forced to have a child I didn't want and was in no way prepared for. 

november 2021 donation

november's donation went to dress for success miami. miami is doing it's annual giving day today and I got an email from them since I gave last year. it's unusual that I should donate to the same org twice, but then, one of my best friend's is COO there. plus, last year, as a surprise, I donated to her org, but missed giving day by just a couple weeks so I wanted to make up for it this time.

october 2021 donation

this month I'm donating to Compton Pledge, which is a UBI (universal basic income) "that will distribute recurring cash relief to low-income residents for 2 years, starting in late 2020." plus the "The Compton Pledge will be the largest city-based guaranteed income pilot in the US, and will harness the power of unconditional cash transfers in service of racial and economic justice."

I'm a believer in UBI but I would like to see more studies on it, and I think this is a great experiment. and I'm so happy to be able to support it financially (even if it's a teeny tiny drop in this bucket).

september 2021 donation

this month I donated to the Moore Institute for Plastic Pollution Research!

captain moore is quite the man! he's founded three non-profits: the moore institute, algalita, and long beach organic. I'm not going to get into any of the orgs or even the man, because if you know me, you know what I think of Charlie and his work. he gave me a chance with algalita, which helped me find my passion for non-profit. plus, what I've learned at algalita i'll take with me thru my life to help make my little corner of the world a better, and greener, one.

investing

a friend recently asked me for some investment advice. i replied to her with the below. I'm copying it here so that I have a copy. plus, some of these links are pretty good.

from what limited stuff I know, there are a few pretty stable things you invest in: bonds, mutual funds, and index funds. bonds are probably too safe (maybe 6%), index funds are in the middle (10%), and mutual funds should make the most (12%). they're all considered very safe investments. obviously, the more risk, the more reward.

good article about mutual fund vs index fund: Index Funds Vs. Mutual Funds: the Main Differences (businessinsider.com)

I don't think you can individually invest in mutual funds? you may need to hire an advisor for mutual funds. I have mutual funds thru my financial advisor (whom I pay a fee to every year).

there are ETFs which are kind of like mutual funds, but can be sold like stocks. I don't remember much about them anymore because I decided that index funds had a better return for the risk.

index funds are next on my "to invest in" list. I was looking at using the Vanguard app when I do. index funds are called a "set and forget" investment cause you're unlikely to want to do anything with the money for a few years. last I checked, there wasn't a fee when using the Vanguard app. I've had a lot of friends (who understand my hesitancy of risk) recommend index funds over any other kind of market investing.

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outside that, I did invest $1000 in stocks using the Robin Hood app. I wouldn't recommend doing as an actual investment since the market is pretty variable, but you can look at  SPGI 444.87 -1.55 -0.35% : S&P Global Inc. - MSN Money

I invested in one share and it's gone nothing but up. slowly but surely. I'm at about an 18% return right now which is AMAZING. it's the "parent company of S&P Global Ratings, S&P Global Market Intelligence, and S&P Global Platts, CRISIL, and is the majority owner of the S&P Dow Jones Indices joint venture." so it's basically buying stocks in the stock market company itself. of course, there are capitol gains taxes (I think 15% right now) which kick in at one year of holding. and, of course, stocks are inherently risky. when I put my $1000 I told myself that I was not to think of it as a money making investment, but as an educational investment, you know?

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the safest things you can do at a bank: high yield savings account, CD accounts, and signing bonuses when opening a bank account.

savings accounts right now are about a 0.3% interest. a high yield savings account is like the same thing, but with almost double the interest: a lot of these are online only. and a few purport to be green (aspiration is a big one) The 6 Best High-yield Savings Accounts of 2021 | Money

with a CD you can get up to double that BUT you have to lock in your money for a set period. let's say you choose a 1 year CD. at the end of the year they give you your let's say 0.7% return. BUT if you withdraw the money before the one year you lose all in the interest, and sometimes there's an additional penalty. generally, the longer the CD, the better the return. but not always: CD account comparison website: 12 Best CD Rates for September 2021 - NerdWallet

something to remember about interest tho, is that the govt kind of sets the rates. so right now interest rates are pretty low, which means that if you decide to put your money in a 5-year CD, you're risking that the interest rates won't get higher (and they probably will).

signing bonuses offer WAY MORE money than interest percentages, plus you also earn interest! usually there are a couple caveats: 1. it has to be "new" money (if you already have an account at Chase you can't get a signing bonus at Chase), and 2. you need to keep the money in the account for some period. and generally you may need a higher minimum. 9 Best Bank Bonuses and Promotions of September 2021 - NerdWallet

the MORAL downside of this is that generally the biggest banks offer the best signing bonuses, and the biggest banks invest in shit like petro-chemical, big pharma, arms, etc. 

this offer is pretty good tho New Chase customer | $225 Chase Total Checking Offer

all you really need is to set up a direct deposit and they'll just give you $225. there's not even a minimum opening amount. 

BUT there is a $12 monthly fee UNLESS you set up a direct deposit of over $500, maintain $1500 in that account at all times, or some other exception I didn't totally understand. 

so it's like your regular bank, but you get $225 for setting up direct deposit, which you might want if you got a new job anyway?

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what's best: divvy up your assets. invest a little here, a little there. do the minimum on a CD account with a great interest rate (or even a couple CD accounts with different terms), get a nice signing bonus with the lowest minimum you can, AND put the rest into a high interest savings account. once you've set all that up, look into investing the rest into bonds or index funds. diversifying is safe. plus, you won't be as affected by the ups and downs of the market.

control

I think there are two sources of control: you think you know better and/or you're insecure

a friend doesn't want to donate money to another friend in need because she doesn't think he's made good decisions with his money so far. if he had planned better he might not be in the current situation. so in giving him more money, her money, he might also waste that money, her money.

well, sure. but once you give something away, it's no longer yours. maybe you're not financing their poor habits, but you're helping them be the person that you enjoy, the person you're friends with. stress of not having money will probably change them, make them less happy, less nice, less pleasant to be around. 

on the other side, are those who don't think they know better, but who are insecure and don't think they can keep you otherwise. so they hold on tight. the jealous type in relationships embodies this type of control. 

august 2020 donation 2

lol, I sort of accidentally donated another $25 to kiva this month. their dumb email had a big button which I clicked and apparently it was to a "one click donation" thing! hahahah, oh well. I had been paid back by my lenders just under $25, so I donated that plus I chipped in an extra $1 because I thought it said something about donating $25, get $25 to lend. i did not get that lend credit, I think because I donated $25 over two transactions. lame. oh well. 

august 2021 donation

this month I donated early, really early, actually, since I normally wait until the last couple days of the month for some reason. anyway, t had a coworker e whom I've actually met a few times. he went to compton initiative a couple times and t has said he's such a nice guy. earlier this year t said that e had run into some financial problems. he had quit his job just before covid to start his own business (so he wasn't eligible for unemployment and obviously no one was hiring anyone for a while), he had bought a condo, then he ended up in the hospital when his ex best friend and roommate assaulted him. she wanted to start a gofundme for him but wasn't sure if he'd accept since he's a very private guy.

anyway, here we are months later and apparently things are dire enough that he's reached out on FB asking for funds. t screenshot me the message and I immediately donated $50. it's not a lot, but it's double my usual monthly donation. and I plan to, in a couple weeks when donations have probably stopped coming in, donate another $50.

july 2021 donation

a little late this month since I started a new job, then thaddeus came for the weekend. but anyway, this month I donated to the united farms workers, which is an org that was started in 1962 and "is the nation’s first enduring and largest farm workers union."

"The UFW continues organizing in major agricultural sectors, chiefly in California. Recent years have witnessed dozens of UFW union contract victories protecting thousands of farm workers, among them agreements with the some of the largest berry, winery, tomato, dairy and mushroom companies in California and the nation. More than 75 percent of California’s fresh mushroom industry is now under union contract. Many recent UFW-sponsored laws and regulations protect all farm workers in California, especially those at non-union ranches. They include the first state standards in the U.S. to prevent further deaths and illnesses from extreme heat and in 2016 the first law in the country providing farm workers in California with overtime pay after eight hours a day. The UFW continues to actively champion legislative and regulatory reforms for farm workers covering issues such as worker protections, pesticides and immigration reform."

somehow I started following them on twitter and have learned a lot about working conditions on farms, how some produce is harvested, and the tremendous work that is rewarded with incredibly little pay. 

also, for some extended reading: 
National Farm Worker Ministry - Children in the Fields
The Atlantic - The Overlooked Children Working America's Tobacco Fields

my body, my choice

there are anti-vaxx people who are now saying "my body, my choice" which, obviously, upsets pro-abortionists. here's the thing, they're not the same bodies or choices. anti-abortionists don't generally deny abortions in order to take control of your body, they do it because (they say) they don't want the fetus (which probably would become a baby) to be "murdered." there's a direct causation that if you have an abortion, this baby will not be born.

on the other hand, anti-vaxxers want to control their own bodies mostly for themselves. yes a large pool of unvaccinated people will give a virus opportunity to mutate into something that be cause vaccinations to become ineffective which in turn may cause you to become sick, but you can't say that this person not getting vaccinated will definitely get someone sick.

this is a poor analogy, and we should stop getting riled up about it. 

all this being said. I do believe in a right to abortions, and also lean towards mandatory vaccinations. I can't say that I'm 100% for it because, like, how would be enforce that? by forcibly vaccinating people at gunpoint or by threatening fines or jail time? those options seem crazy. altho, we have actually vaccinated people by gunpoint before (seriously, see slide 4). I do like that in many public schools kids can't attend unless their vaccinated against certain things (usually DTaP and MMR) but I don't quite know how you can enforce that with adults working in non-governmental agencies. I guess you could say people entering federal land need to show proof of vaccination along with govt issued ID, but that seems kind of ridiculous since there is a LOT of federal land and what does this regulation even really do?

one thing I would like to see if that the govt should at some point establish a deadline of "get the shot before then or we won't pay for your medical bills if you do get COVID." like, you had PLENTY of opportunity to get the shot, for free, and you just didn't. there would be exceptions for certain people (those who can't vs those who won't), but most of the currently unvaccinated have just chosen not to get it done.  

asian american - pt 2

Conscious Style Guide - Drop the Hyphen in Asian American

when I was a kid, I played around with Asian American or American Asian, and for some time I classified myself as American Asian, because I felt American first. my parents, not having been born or raised here, were Asian American.

I don't remember thinking much about the hyphen tho. I think agree with Maxine Hong Kingston, that “I have been thinking that we ought to leave out the hyphen in ‘Chinese-American,’ because the hyphen gives the word on either side equal weight, as if linking two nouns. …Without the hyphen, ‘Chinese’ is an adjective and ‘American’ a noun; a Chinese American is a type of American." this runs parallel to the idea I had about Asian American vs American Asian. 

in the comments where I found the above article linked, someone said that "Asian Americans are Asian migrants who now have American citizenship, and so, they're in the same category as African migrants who now have American citizenship, and therefore are African Americans. There's therefore a distinction between African Americans and Black Americans." which is true! white Charlize Theron was born in South African and is now American. she is fully African American, tho not Black. and Rhianna is part Black and was born in Barbados, not Africa (tho her mom is Afro-Guyanese), so she's not African American. but then, what are people like me? I guess the rather wordy: American of Asian descent, because I don't think we'll ever be referred to as yellow Americans (nor should we be!).

p.s.
we SHOULD start using white American a lot more, or at least until we stop using race as a common identifier. otherwise, American will always default to being a white person.

asian american - pt 1

I remember from when I was kid, my dad told me a story of him and his Asian Hawaiian coworker. something about how the coworker called himself an American, but that my dad thought that was only half the story since white Americans will never see Asian Americans as truly American.

when I was much younger I disagreed with him. it was true for him, maybe, since he was a naturalized citizen who only came to the US in his 20s and still spoke in a heavy accent. but me, I'm American! I was born and raised here; I speak with a SoCal accent. white Americans will see me as one any other American.

I think it was only in high school that I realized he was right. by then I was at a school white a ton more people (2000 students) and more racial diversity.  

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the last part of this article in the NYT: 
...I told my parents they were wrong about who we were. We were Asian-American, not Asian, and we were definitely not Oriental.
“We’re not American,” they said. “We’re Asian." At least they didn’t laugh me out of the house for my arrogance.
“Asian-American,” I said. “Not Asian Asian.”
That was more than 20 years ago. On a recent visit to New Jersey, I asked my parents, former Reagan Republicans turned staunch Obama Democrats who voted for Bernie Sanders in the 2016 primary, if they felt American now that they’ve been in the United States for half a century.
“Of course,” my mother said. “What else would I be? Even though other Americans don’t see me as American.”
“Well, who cares how they see us,” my father said. “They can think what they want, but it doesn’t matter to me.”
I hope he’s right. Regardless of how we are seen by others, we are the ones who can best see ourselves.

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New American Economy - Combatting the AAPI Perpetual Foreigner Stereotype

june 2021 donation

this was a fun one! the Animal Rescue League occasionally has a "poorly drawn pets" fundraiser. I missed the last one so jumped this time to pay $25 for a poorly drawn molly. that's right, annie's molly, not my roux. a had to put down molly earlier this year due to her poor health but she was an incredible companion to a, and I'm very thankful. so I texted a and asked for her favorite photo of molly, no questions asked. 

I'll update again when I get the actual drawing!

p.s. technically this is NOT a donation since I'm getting something in return. but I'm counting it as a donation because that's how the org framed it. so yeah, next time you get something from a donation: membership, swag, a poorly drawn pet, you won't also be getting a tax deductible donation receipt because it wasn't actually a donation. ...you'd be surprised how often people argued with me at Algalita. they'd come in, buy an actual thing, and ask for a donation receipt. um.. no. you get a sales receipt, and you paid sales tax, because it was a sale. 

update!!! molly looks so good! on one hand I kind of wanted a terrible one because I think they're so funny. but I'm not totally sure how a would've liked that so possibly this was better. anyway, I sent it over to a and she said she loved it :) wanted to print it and add it to molly's memorial shrine. 

another update!! they put up a flickr album of a bunch of their favorites and of course molly made the cut! they raised nearly $36,000 and their 175+ volunteers drew over 1400 portraits :)

stocks

i invested about $1000 in the stock market (using robinhood) about a month ago. first i put in $500 and was soon up $20. then I put in another $500 and was up a total of $25, lol. but pretty soon tho I was up $80!!! and now, about 5 weeks in, I'm up $16. hahahhaha. what a ride. tho I didn't really invest to make money; I really just wanted to learn how to do it. and so far, I've learned a few things:

- buy a reasonable amount of shares in each company.

     I'm naturally cautious so I was buying like 3-5 stocks in each company regardless of their worth. well. 3 stocks at $3 doesn't do anything at all. now I invest about $50 or $100 in each company.

- decide how much you want to buy before you start clicking on stuff.

     prices can change in seconds, so know what you want before you click BUY since it'll take a few more clicks before your order actually goes thru. those seconds can matter. sucks when you realize you bought a stock for 15 cents more just because you wasted time on the buying page. 

- don't trade after market (at least on robinhood anyway)

     robinhood automates your aftermarket trades so it'll actually buy or sell when IT decides prices are right, not when you want.

- know that the biggest fluctuations are early in the day, so use that to your advantage.

     I don't know anything about market advantages, I mean personality advantages. if you like risk, trade within the first couple hours of the market opening. if you don't like risk, wait to later in the day.

- if you're not planning to day-trade (buying and selling the same stock in the same day, or within a very short time), there's no need to keep checking back on your investments. it'll just drive you crazy.

this rolls into the most important tip:

- know yourself

     1. know how much you can monetarily lose. go in thinking of your investment as a total loss. don't expect to make money, and don't invest more than you can throw away.

     2. know how much you can actually "mentally" lose. are you a person who always overthink things? probably best to not get into stocks. to the average person, there is no clear time to buy or sell and you'll end up making a bunch of "wrong" decisions. if you're going to be mad about all those decisions then do yourself a favor and don't bother investing cause you'll just be mad all the time.

something I haven't figured out yet. when to sell! obviously you should sell then prices are up, but.. how up? and way more importantly, if a stock is crashing, when should you sell then? since I've invested $50-$100 in each company, I'm willing to lose up to 20% in each. BUT I'm also in this for at least the end of the year so I'll probably wait until November and start selling slowly. 

may 2021 donation

this month I donated to ProPublica because of their investigative journalism, and because, well, I didn't have access to my wallet so needed to donate using paypal. (seriously tho, orgs need to do better at this. I literally tried a half dozen other sites first because I've already donated to journalism and wanted to do a new field. plus, I know I'm not the only person who prefers to donate thru paypal. I had a couple Algalita supporters specifically ask about adding the option to our website.)

"ProPublica is an independent, nonprofit newsroom that produces investigative journalism with moral force. We dig deep into important issues, shining a light on abuses of power and betrayals of public trust — and we stick with those issues as long as it takes to hold power to account."

their mission is "to expose abuses of power and betrayals of the public trust by government, business, and other institutions, using the moral force of investigative journalism to spur reform through the sustained spotlighting of wrongdoing."

favorite videos

a list of a few of my absolute favorite videos from the last year or so. they're mostly under a minute each because for some reason I don't have the patience for video. I wanted to make this list cause I keep loosing them on my twitter so I want a place I can come back to and keep laughing my face off. not going to bother embedding cause I'm too lazy. 

inventing the clock

vaccinated. let the party commence! 

angry ikea employee

put it outside!

harry and william

possum vs skunk (no sound)

dog at the beach

"but it got stuck in my butthole"

phil collins deer

not funny but awesome ditty about not needing to be polite to creepy men

best friends

a month ago, as I was walking Roux, a man on a bike kept circling back to us and complimenting Roux. eventually he asked "isn't he the best boy?" "yeah, he's pretty good" I replied. he did not seem to like this answer. he asked "isn't he your best friend?" "no" "why not?" "cause he's a dog."

my dog isn't my best friend partly because he doesn't conversate back. I don't know what he's thinking most of the time. in fact, my relationship with Roux is pretty one-sided. I provide him everything he needs, plus extra but he doesn't doesn't give me much of anything in return. he snuggles me sometimes, but I don't generally want or need that. I haven't had anything really bad happen in the last two years so I haven't needed his comfort, even if he were to offer it. (which apparently dogs are good for)

mostly tho, he's not my best friend because I have people for that. people who care for me more than for what I give them. people who may not always be happy to see me, but then, neither does Roux seem to be.

some people say their pets are their best friends because of the unconditional love. well, I don't need that either. I have human friends and parents who provide me close to unconditional love. and should they withdraw it, I should really take a good look at myself to see what I'm doing wrong. I don't need (nor want) a constant cheerleader telling me how much they love me or how well I'm doing. I would prefer someone to keep me accountable, someone who will keep me honest and good. less than that.

I may have written about this before, but I really do wonder how ethical it is to keep pets. they're mostly for our entertainment. they're little different from the animals at the zoo except that the cages are our own homes. they are expected to be obedient to us and sleep, pee, eat, play when we want them to. zoo animals can at least pee and poop when they want. as much as some would like to think that we're on semi equal ground, because we have to take them on walks, pick up their poo, provide separate meals and medications for them, we're not equal at all. at any moment you decide not to keep your pet, yet they have no such freedom. it's a little like slavery if you think about it. and how can you be best friends with someone who is so beholden to you? 

the one

I just finished watching "The One" on Netflix. I won't spoil anything, but the premise is that you can submit your DNA to a company and they'll "match" you to your "one," assuming they're in the database too, of course. when you meet your "match" it'll be like nothing you've experienced before. like you kind of already know them from somewhere, and they'll be irresistible to you, you both to each other, even if you don't know you're matched. 

an interesting "side effect" is that they are a lot divorces after current spouses take the test anyway and get matched to people who they're not currently married to. I can totally see this happening, lol. the british govt gets really antsy about the rising divorce rate (the show is set in London), but the founder of the company says that eventually marriages will be on the rise, and there won't be divorces at all anymore since everyone will be matched. supposedly, if you're already happy with your spouse, you won't submit your DNA.

an interesting side story is that a happily married woman submits her husband's DNA. he gets matched to another lady. she looks up the woman, befriends her by going to her yoga classes, and generally acts a crazy person. it comes a head when the husband (who knows nothing of this) goes thru the wife's phone and unwittingly invites his wife's new yoga friend to a surprise birthday party he's throwing for his wife. the matches meet at the party, have a connection, but don't know exactly why. eventually the wife tells her husband who this woman is. he ends up telling his match why their connection is so strong. blah blah blah. he eventually chooses his wife and the heartbroken match plans to move far away. but before she does, she asks the wife why she didn't submit her own dna rather than her husbands? the wife says that she loves her husband and she's secure enough with that.

I think the psychology is really interesting cause the science is obviously crazy. this actually happens several times in the show, but people obviously have a choice in who they decide to be with, regardless of their connection with someone else. worth mentioning that in the show you can also, albeit very rarely, be matched to more than one person (usually your match's sibling, or someone they share a lot of DNA with. [I did immediately think of identical twins when they were introducing the science, altho did you know that even identical twins don't have identical DNA?]) 

one more interesting tidbit is that, well, being matched to someone doesn't mean you'll be happy. there's a reference to this: this one promising young woman gets matched to a druggie repeat bad criminal guy. like, that does happen. people fall in love all the time with people who are "bad" for them. but again, you always have a choice. loving someone doesn't mean you have to be with them. and this is further demonstrated in that people are getting matched to others around the world. but like, what if neither of you can (or wants to) leave where you are? 

anyway, it's a howcatchem series of only 8 episodes, kind of dumb, but I did definitely enjoy it.

lie better

in the last couple weeks I've had two people tell me blatantly incorrect things. 

1: last week I was on the phone with a time share salesman (my parents called me during their meeting and had him speak to me). my parents said two years ago they paid for product A with his company. he said they didn't. I asked if could print out a copy of the contract from two years ago so that I could review it when they got home. he said that they were not allowed a copy of their contract. ...I asked him to clarify. indeed, he said my parents were not allowed to have a copy of the contact they signed with his company. I said that made no legal sense, especially since they had a copy at home anyway. I asked if it wasn't instead that he didn't have access to it? he said no, they just couldn't have it. we would have to call a different number to get permission for them to get us a copy.

2: I was on the phone with my financial advisor whom I have never communicated with but with whom my parents have had a relationship for well over a decade. he manages two accounts under my name and has for many years. I'm finally wanting to start learning about financial markets and my investments, etc. so I emailed him last week, introduced myself, the situation, and asked 3 general questions about my accounts. he emailed back with a phone number inviting me to call him. I was annoyed cause, like, email is easier and I don't know much so this way I can go look terms and stuff up later. but fine, whatever, I'll call this time. a couple days ago my dad mentioned that he had talked to the financial advisor who said that he doesn't prefer to email with clients because his company reads all his emails. I said, that's fine. I don't want to be doing anything illegal, so I'm glad his company is reading our emails and screening for that sort of thing. 

today I get on phone with him and he says that he prefers phone calls, to which I said I prefer email because this way I can look stuff up later since I don't know anything about stocks, etc. he said that his company didn't allow for FAs to email with their clients about their accounts. ...what? he clarified that, yeah, his company doesn't allow FAs to email clients answering questions from clients about what their FA was doing with the money we pay them to manage. I asked if he could find that policy in writing and send that to me because that seemed super weird. he said that no, he wouldn't, but that I could switch FAs. I said, okay, I might, but if he could send me a copy of the policy anyway because if this is a company-wide policy I would be in the same position with the next FA anyway. I want to know what the rules are so I don't keep breaking them, you know? he said no, and that my new FA may or may not comply and send me the policy themselves.

we moved on. but later in the conversation he says that technically he shouldn't have ever signed me on because 1. he's never actually communicated directly with me, just my parents, and that 2. one of my accounts was too small for his company to handle. I put two and two together and realized THAT'S why he lied about this ridiculous "company policy" about emails. he later also mentioned later that he's old so isn't good at computers, doesn't like email, and has an assistant handle this type of thing.

WHY DO PEOPLE LIE ABOUT THE DUMBEST MOST OBVIOUS SHIT?! first, you should never assume that people are idiots and don't know basic fucking things. second, don't double down on your dumbshit lie when I ask you to clarify, when I repeat to you in an incredulous tone your own stupid words. like, backtrack man, I obviously don't believe you. you're just digging yourself into a deeper hole by cementing to me that you're a liar. 

is this what it's like now in our "post-truth" world? did donald trump and his constant and consistent denial of basic verifiable facts break people's brains leading them to think that this type of behavior is okay? well, it's fucking not, people, wth. 

april 2021 donation

this month I donated to a "friend's" medical bill gofundme. friend is in quotation marks because I've only met him a couple times when he went in to shop at BYO @ Algalita. we struck up a conversation and I started following him on Instagram. I have not done this with any other customer, so I guess that says something? 

anyway, apparently he was in some sort of accident. I dunno what because there are very few details on his instagram but that's cool. basically tho, he needs $22k to help with medical bills (much of it dental), and he's about half way there.

again, I don't really know him so I can't say much about him, but one of the reasons I found him interesting enough to follow was that a few years ago he went on a dating show thing where he met, dated, "married," someone within a few hours. it was on youtube I think. anyway, it shows how adventurous, positive, and open he is, which is super cool. he has since deleted the post on his instagram so you'll just have to believe me when I tell you that he's very charming, hahah, even tho the relationship ultimately did not work out. 

if you are a creeper, you can go thru his instagrams and get a feel for what a good, kind, gentle person he is, and hopefully you'll donate too. 

ewg

I recently had a couple friends ask me about laundry detergent. I didn't have a recommendation but I did refer them to the Environmental Working Group's laundry detergent rating page. the EWG is a great resource that I've used more and more often to see what products are actually environmentally friendly. they mostly look at how dangerous the chemicals are but also rate other things too, depending on what type of things you're looking at. they rate a lot of things, from cleaning products to cosmetics to food (I looked up sunscreen a couple months ago), and rate conventional brand names to smaller purported eco brands as well. 

apparently they have an app too, which I haven't used, since I really don't shop very much at all. but I'll definitely be consulting the EWG on future purchases, especially since greenwashing is getting crazy out of hand these days!

suicide services

if I were in charge of things, there would be a service to help you plan your suicide. you would make at least two appointments with two different therapists who wouldn't try to talk you into or out of anything, but they would listen to you explain why you felt strongly you wanted to die. if they both agree that you appear of sound mind, that this isn't a rash decision, and that this isn't because of a temporary situation that can otherwise be solved, they would individually approve of your case.

after that the service would help you plan stuff out: what to do with your stuff, who to notify, funeral arrangements, and how, when, and where you want to do it. this creates less burden on others, gives you some control over what happens, and also draws out the process a little to make sure you're serious. I would hope that beginning to almost end (from your reaching out to the service, to be given the means of suicide), would take at least three months.

after everything is planned, the service would give you the drugs or whatever it is you decided on as your method of suicide. you would have someone with you, or at least nearby, to make sure things don't go wrong. BUT they aren't to pressure you in any way. should you change your mind, great! if you don't, you'll know that your plans will be carried out after your death. 

I don't think this is morbid at all. if anything, I think it's immensely practical and respectful. I think it's rather rude of people to tell you that you don't actually want to kill yourself, things will get better! well, maybe they won't, or maybe they will but I don't want to be around for it. maybe I just want to die but am scared of screwing up. maybe I don't want to traumatize whoever finds my body.  maybe everything anything, I don't care. I respect your decision. I think as long as it doesn't hurt others, you should have a certain amount of autonomy over your own body and life. hurting others emotionally because they don't respect your decision to do with your life what you will, doesn't count. keeping yourself alive just to appease others is no way to live, I think, unless that's what you want to do. in which case, you're allowed to do that freely as well.

march 2021 donation

this month I donated to waterstations.org, an organization that provides water to "reduce the risk of heat related death of any individuals crossing the Southern California desert and surrounding areas."

I felt like I should probably have donated to an aapi org because of all the recent attacks, but I donate to whatever is pulling my heartstrings at the moment, and right now that's the crazy immigration situation at our southern border. 

there was a tweet from Rania Khalek last week about how kids are still being locked in cages. "Everyone wanted to pretend this was an outcome of Trump being an evil person when the real issue is our immigration and border system is cruel and evil no matter who is in charge and both parties are complicit."

gender

Podcast: Knowledge Gaps in Intersex Health Care (undark.org)

I always thought that if I had kids I'd want to raise them fairly gender neutral. I would allow them to decide what they want to wear, play with, participate in. tho I admit, I will cringe my little girl will only wear pink and play with dolls, or if my little boy only wants to play with guns and wear camo. 

this extends to if i had an intersex child. unless it was medically necessary, I wouldn't want to have my child undergo gender "assignment" surgery. like, what if I make the wrong decision? what if I choose for my child to be a boy and they grow up feeling like a girl? or what if they never want to choose? ugh. no thanks. kid, you can decide and I'll support you no matter what.

I understand that childhood will be much harder for an intersex kid. for some reason people are obsessed with sex and gender. people apologize to me and roux when they mislabel him as a girl. like, what difference does it make? least of all to him! but I think being honest with my child, and allowing them to make their own decisions is the most respectful thing I can do. this is their life and I don't think I should be able to, basically unilaterally, decide this for them.

evil

Matt Ruby - Just how evil is Amazon? And am I awful for being a Prime addict?
also: Gizmodo - Is Amazon Evil and Am I Evil for Using It?

what is evil? people in the article above define it as:  not capitalism, something that is out of normal, dodging taxes, and "what lies outside the boundary of the moral community."

personally, i think I would evil as purposely hurting something (or someone) purely for one's own gain. therefore, amazon (bezos) is evil, because it repeatedly hurts the environment, local economies, and its workers to make more money for itself. plus, unregulated capitalism is definitely evil and amazon is trying its best to deregulate itself. 

so if amazon is evil, are you evil for shopping with them? no, because you're not purposely hurting anything. you're inadvertently hurting the environment, local economy, and fellow humans. also doing evil things does not make you evil anywat, unless those evil actions are born of evil beliefs. most people shop on amazon because it's easy and they think it's cheaper (tho often times it's not), not because they want to underpay workers, ruin the environment, destabilize the community, etc. however, they know they're doing these things second hand through amazon, and yet continue to do it anyway. which, again, while not evil, is certainly not good.

I think the majority of middle class americans have heard of a lot of the bad things amazon does and have decided to not think about it. to not take responsibility for encouraging evil because they are not themselves actively committing evil. but every decision you make is another opportunity to reinforce your beliefs, since it doesn't really matter you think if your actions don't reflect it. I think shopping on amazon shows that you value your convenience and wallet over your moral code (because I think most people say they value the environment, the local economy, and worker's rights).

so don't do it. decide now that you ARE a moral human. that the convenience of getting something shipped straight to your door matters less than the health of planet you live on and will leave to future generations. that your wanting to save a couple bucks matters less than the health and quality of life for 800,000+ amazon employees. that your 15 minutes saved by not price comparison shopping matters less than supporting local or smaller shops which hold up our community and pay a hell of a lot more in taxes than amazon does so that you don't have to be taxed more to subsidize bezos and his legal tax dodging.

don't perpetuate evil and don't support amazon. 

february 2021 donation

I was going to "cheat" this month too and count my over $50 of recent shipping costs to mail USBs/SD cards and cameras as my donation, BUT I just realized how much money I'm getting on unemployment, so I can certainly afford to donate an extra $25 this month.

I had really wanted to get to my list from last year (heavy on abortion rights, journalism, etc.), but Texas is having a really hard time of it right now so I'm donating to West Street Recovery. I found them thru the Strategist list. they're a new org, founded in 2018 with a less than $600k operating budget so I couldn't find that much info on them, nor any financials, but I'm donating anyway since I like their mission, their structure, their website, and their instagram, ha. also, I can donate thru PayPal which covers transaction fees. I've been really trying to use PayPal more on websites, rather than giving my credit card info since I feel like it's that much safer. ...who knows if it actually is. apparently my donation will just cover an hour of staff time :)

cameras

t asked a while ago on what to do with her old working DSLR. I suggested she contact khs and cypress college since they both had photography departments when we were there, altho i wasn't sure about now. a while later, my dad told me he was going to give his old working semi-manual camera to good will or whomever did a collection next. I asked he hold onto it for a while for me to do some research, since I had a point and shoot, and was certain others did too.

turns out there are very few groups that want digital point and shoots! film cameras are still in demand, as as DSLRs but simple cameras, not so much. did find one tho: project kare, which distributes the cameras at the "Mae Ra Moe refugee camp on the Thai/Burma border and to Karen State in Burma." 

"Our annual Student Photography Project has become a highlight the students look forward to every year! Dozens of students will be excited to take your used digital cameras home to photograph their family, friends, neighbors, and interesting scenes in their community...  Cameras are rare in the refugee camp and Karen State so students are very excited just to hold a camera. Having the opportunity to take one home and take photos is awesome! We award your donated cameras to winners of the photography contest, for students who produce the most compelling photos, their overall collection of pictures."

long story a little shorter, I asked friends and put up a post on FB and ended up shipping 9 cameras. thank yous to my dad, sophia (she's asked a friend and they donated 4 total!), ting, and alex (from dragon boat).

hit a snag in the mailing tho, apparently you can't mail that many lithium ion batteries in a single box that isn't its original packaging. but anyway, I emailed the org and they said that they normally purchase extra batteries for all the cameras anyway so I should just send them without. 

also, be sure to follow their facebook for photos from the cameras you donated! this set probably won't g up for a while since they're not planning on traveling there soon, but hopefully within the next year our cameras will be useful again :)

january 2021 donation

I'm "cheating" a bit this month. I'm counting my $80 annual national parks pass for my donation. cheating because it's not technically a donation since I'm getting membership, but I'm counting it anyway because entrance at Bryce was only $35 but I decided to get the annual pass anyway. I was going to get it at an earlier national park, but somehow none of them had anyone collecting so it was only at our last park that we got charged.

vaccinating teachers

Axios - Teachers want the vaccine, but they'll have to wait
WBEZ Chicago - Chicago Teachers Say They Won’t Put Their Families At Risk By Returning To The Classroom

this is so ridiculous. of COURSE we should vaccinate teachers before REQUIRING them to go back to work in classrooms!! people under 16 aren't even approved for vaccination yet they for sure can get sick and/or pass it along.

wtf would even be the point of not vaccinating teachers anyway? they'll start to get sick right away, need to take time off, we'll hire subs, who will also get sick, and eventually we'll be out of teachers. how is this a necessary process? 

honestly, i'm so annoyed that most countries are vaccinating the elderly and at risk before the actual essential workers, or even the rest of the working population. in america all we hear about is opening up the economy, but how can we do that if we can't go back to work or do regular things because we're afraid of getting sick? yes, vaccinating the elderly will prevent more deaths, but that's not actually useful in the long run. more useful would be vaccinating teachers, postal workers, bus drivers, people who are forced to come into contact with many people. this will slow the spread of the disease sooner than it would if we were to vaccinate older or more at-risk populations first. high on our priority list would also be essential workers like grocery store people, delivery people, agricultural workers, people who cannot work from home. they keep the world running, not retired people who can choose to stay home or go out. 

i'm not against the elderly getting vaccinated, but it doesn't make much sense to base their priority sorely on age. a more reasonable criteria would be job sector. i do understand that it's much easier to do this by age though since you can "prove" that much more easily. 

related article from Reuters: Why Indonesia is vaccinating its working population first, not elderly

an excerpt: "Younger working adults are generally more active, more social and travel more so this strategy should decrease community transmission faster than vaccinating older individuals,” he said."

I think that it may seem more moral to vaccinate the elderly first because it will prevent more immediate deaths. however, I do think that in the long term, vaccinating more "essential" and "active" people first would prevent more total deaths and long term negative effects in the world, including, yes, the global economy. 

also, this article about Age groups' contribution to COVID-19 transmission in the U.S.!!!

for angela

there's a homeless lady in our area. she's a regular; i see hear maybe once a month and she's the only one i've really noticed. probably because she's a woman. 

anyway, i found a couple pairs of brand new socks at the house and didn't want / need them, and neither did my mom, and I thought of her. I kept them in our basket of things to be donated near the front door, and eventually was able to give them to her. she accepted them, was polite, and not overly grateful, which I liked.

about a month later, she's still on my mind. it's so cold at nights and one night it poured rain. last week I saw her and asked if she needed anything. she said possibly a small blanket. I had just visited my parents (I go once a week), and didn't plan to go again until the next weekend. so I told her to come find me in a week and a half and I'd see what I'd have for her.

but I couldn't wait that whole 7-8 days tho cause it is so cold at night, and it's not like my days are so busy anyway, so I went on monday to get assorted blankets, a long wool coat from my mom, cleared out a large backpack (hers is so small), and a few other clothing items. I'd also asked ting a few days before and she donated a bunch of clothes too! and toiletries! the homeless lady is quite thin but wears a lot of layers so I don't think she'd do well with too much of my clothes. 

so we collected pretty much everything on the floor in the photo for her. (not the shoes, those are mine. the homeless lady is a size 9), plus the coat draped over the chair.

i was nervous that since I had asked her to come back in a week and a half but went early, I'd just have this sitting in our living room for a week. amazingly, the very next morning, I saw her! i had prepared the backpack for her, and added some fruit, a $40 gift card to walgreens (it was a gift to me and I never shop there), and a $25 starbucks from ting (also a gift). i offered her a choice of the blankets, said she could take them all if she wanted, tho she only wanted the smallest blanket. I've noticed that she is not one of those who keeps a lot of things in a shopping cart. she has a small backpack and a smaller tote stuffed full, but that's it. 

she seemed most appreciative of the coat and the backpack. she asked more than once that my mom didn't mind giving away the coat, and later asked me to thank my mom for it. :) ting and I both gave a good amount of thought of what to give. what was appropriate (ting gave some used but great condition socks) and sizes (I gave her new underwear in small size, but a jacket in medium of layering), and I think we dd good. 

oh, btw, I didn't think to ask her name until tuesday (today) when I gave her the stuff.