dead tired

well hm... if someone can get a patent on the peanut butter and jelly sandwhich now, maybe i should go file for a patent on hamburger, cheeseburger, and pizza. americans will no longer be able to eat anything at all! and they will all pay millions to me to eat their fatty fatty foods! and because they will have given practically all their money to me then they will have to visit the legoland disneyland. yep. someone has a little too much time on their hands. and if you have you have too much time on your hands, go watch this kind of neato cool commercial and then go play whizball. it's pretty hard. bleh. am tired. btw. everyone has been dying lately. who's next. could it be you?!

erm...

it's hard to come up wit the right thing to say when someone tells you that something terrible just happend to them. and for those of you who think the useless 'i'm sorry' is good enough, wtf are you sorry for anyway? huh? think you control the world or something and can make things happen or not happen? sheesh. but anyway. it's difficult to say the the right thing. some of it does, however, have to do wit the fact that different people want to hear different things. and so you have to tailor your responses. problem wit that is tho, that you don't kno wat they want to hear anyway! should you offer suggestions on how to fix the problem? or should you just sympathize? bleh. then you feel bad for not helping them feel better. pleh...

'what do you need from me tonight' 'the truth is so complicated now' 'i can't pretend it's alright' 'maybe we'll find a way somehow'

smiley joe

let's start off tonight's update wit games. a really hard one is gyroball. serioulsy, really hard. another game. not so hard, but tgat requires more thinking and less refleces is oshiro. this one has very pretty music. i'm keeping it on my desktop just for the background noise. and moving on to the news... a man was stuck in a elevator for three days. eesh! it's only too bad he got stuck after delivering the food, or he wouldn't have had to go hungry. but besides the whole starvation and dehydration issue, one can certainly get lonely, being all... alone... for three days. maybe he ought to do like ozzy and talk to his knees. um... right. and in other news. a gentleman has offered to pay millions to paris for just being herself. isn't he a sweetheart? he must have seen a picture of her and thought 'gee, she's really thin. she must be starving. and wat's more. she has too be really really poor. look at her lack of clothing. poor girl. i think i'll give her some money.' pretty cool.

i love, i love!

i invite you to view pictures of the 2006 bmw z4. i don't much like it. but i dunno. i didn't like the z4 at all when it came out. i liked the z3 much better. but now, i'm about even. both are beautiful cars. it doesn't really compare to the vanquish, but then, wat really does? oh, wait, strike that. at the top of my list are the panoz esperante (05 more than 04) and ferrari f430 and each of the three aston martins: vanquish, db9, and vantage). also love the viper srt-10, ford shelby gr-1 and their mustange mach1 fastback. and of course, the much appreciated bently continental gt (nix the brown leather tho. i like it black). used to love the lotus elise and the chrysler me 4-12, but not so much anymore. wat has replaced the elise however, is the sport exige. beautiful. eesh. looking at these pictures it's totally obvious wat kind of car i like... sleek but still brawny. just like how i like my men! :) btw, my car. my baby. am currently deciding between the names of christie and selena. any other suggestions? anyway, while you're at it, here's a link to a bunch of pictures from the 2005 la car show. went to the '04 one, it was great. didn't really think about going this year, but next year? i'll be there. but until then... i'm taking application for a sugar daddy/mommy. no resumes or bank statements needed. just send over any brand new car on this list for me to keep and i'll consider you. send over any of the cars on my most wanted list and i will seriously consider you. good luck! oh. and one more thing, lamborghinis i don't like. unless it's the 350 gtv. now there's a golden oldie. hm... i could go on and on about cars and all their splendorous beauty but well, this beautiful splendor herself needs some sleep. regular 'funny' updates resume romrow for the rest of the week until the weekend.g'night y'all.

mr & m(r)s?

you kno wat's a pretty good show? maximum exposure. it's on kind of latish at night. funny stuff. want to see an episode? dl that and others here (altho you'll have to sign up). at any rate. you kno wat's kind of weird? getting the winning lotto numbers from a fortune cookie. but wat if you and your hubby win the jackpot together? you gonna put that in your joint bank account, or split it into seperate ones? i've always thought that a married couple should share a bank account. having seperate ones just seemed like a really bad idea (maybe it was from reading the joy luck club that i feel this way?). but appt it works, read about it here. anyway, enough wit the seriousness, go find out the 10 best and worst couples of all time.

world domination

bleh, spring break is over. and so is spring cleaning. so if you finally cleaned your basement of all those dead bodies, maybe it's also time you got into crafts and skinned off the faces and made them into clothing. or, you can save the time, pour quicklime over those bodies, and just get this apron of flesh. and since you saved time from not sewing all those skins together a la that crazy guy besides hannibal from silence of the lambs, you can go figure out 13 things that even scientists don't get. then you should tell me. and i'll tear your arguements apart and make fun of you for being stupid and make you feel so bad about yourself you develop an eating disorder to cope and i will steal your ideas and write and publish a paper that stuns the world of science and everyone will praise me even more than ever before because i can write amazingly long sentences linking fragments together by using only one conjusction over and over and over. yes. that's right. i rule. and you suck. and smell. damnit. 'you smell so bad, i wish a deoderant suicide bomber would run up under your armpit and explode.' word.