love is...

the hard thing about love is that everyone defines it differently. m said recently that love to him means wanting to spend the rest of his life with someone. apparently j used to define it the same way. that and never giving up on someone. oy.

love, to me, is completely different. for me, love is the physical feeling. liking someone doesn't have a physical weight to me. loving someone does. i can feel it in my chest. as if the amount or the intensity has made it a tangible thing that takes up space in my body.

i feel like wanting to spend your life with someone, or never wanting to give up on them, can be a consequence of love. but that's not what love actually is. maybe that's why i can so easily say that love doesn't mean very much. because you can certainly love someone and leave them. love someone and hurt them. because love is just a feeling. actions don't necessarily follow.

the other thing about love is that even if you define it the same way, it still might not actually be the same thing. there is no objective scale here. your 9 of 10 might only be my 6 of 10. you'll be disappointed to hear i'm only at a 6 but maybe i have a broader scale or higher hopes. 

how "funny" that i've never asked anyone before what love means to them.