in a marriage, is sex a reasonable expectation? if it is, it seems to follow that if you're not sleeping with your spouse, they should be allowed to get it somewhere else, right? morally, you can't really be upset. especially if they're sexing up a pro (ie a prostitute). i mean, if they were sleeping with a friend/coworker whatever there's risk of them crossing the line and developing feelings for them.
it's weird tho. cause people like sex at different frequencies. so at what point do you draw the line?
say you like sex a couple times a week. but you're willing to settle for a couple times a month, at a minimum of 20 times a year. this is already much less than you'd like! now say you and your husband haven't had sex with in 3 months, and you've averaged only 10 times the last two years. your husband is able to have sex, just doesn't want to. you've been to counseling, done dr prescribed drugs, and everything else just short of rape.
how mad can he really be if you find yourself a gigolo?
Tuesday, January 27, 2015
Wednesday, January 21, 2015
buffets
Jed Oelbaum - All-You-Can-Eat Buffets: The Scourge of Modern Behavioral Economics
interesting article! and so many interesting factoids i'll list them here!
“Given a choice between…their absolute favorite food or…a choice from a buffet of options, capuchin monkeys will opt for variety.” ... people ate almost 43 percent more M&Ms when there were 10 versus seven colors of candy in the bowl. In fact, the more options we have, the more us hungry, hungry hominids will eat in general, leading to the next point in buffet economics: the glutton factor."
"Other researchers have correlated the quantity of repeat trips one makes to a Chinese buffet with a set of traits, including body mass index, or BMI. While this conclusion—overweight people eat more—might seem obvious, the researchers also connect the quest for seconds and thirds with factors like plate size, how long one spends surveying their options before taking their initial serving, and whether the patron is seated facing, or turned away from, the steaming trays of lo, chow, and other various meins."
"People also may think they’re at buffets to eat a lot of cheap food, but according to science, the cheaper that buffet is, the less happy you’ll be... low prices at buffets leave people feeling less satisfied. That’s right, paying more for one’s food is a kind of self-fulfilling prophecy, also tied to our sense of value."
"Eat at pricier buffets with as many options as possible, in order to maximize your own satisfaction and the appeal of the meal you’re taking on. Use a large plate, and sit facing the buffet. By doing these things, you increase your chances of actually “beating the house”
me? i don't like buffets (according to the author, this is because i'm apparently a jerk!) because i can never eat even close to the charged amount. therefore, i prefer breakfast buffets. because i don't generally fill up on bread items like waffles, pancakes, toast (i prefer meats) and i LOVE berries, which are expensive.
my usual modus operandi at a buffet is to hit up every station, but one at a time. unless i know i won't like something i take a little bit of every item and go back to my table to try it all out. this way, if it turns out i don't like something and don't want to finish it, i waste very little. after finishing my samples from that station, i go back and get the items i like. if i didn't like much, i move onto the next station and repeat the process. i always try fill my plate and generally eat everything on it. i start with salad and finish with dessert. sometimes i try the soup, but not usually since i find most soups rather salty, and besides, they take up valuable stomach space. or, if i'm interested in the soups. i'll fill up on the main courses first then move back to soups. i also generally do not try to "over" eat on the expensive items. i like what i like and i'm not going to eat food i don't like just to "make it worth my money."
usually, at home, i eat until i first feel full. then i'll finish my bowl. when eating out, if i can't finish what's on my plate, i'll generally eat half so i can take the rest home. i don't like taking home less than a meal. it seems wasteful. when at a buffet i always overeat, lol. another reason i hate buffets! but i tend to eat slowly so can actually eat way more than i normally do. i seem to have a very elastic stomach. a time or two, at a $40+ vegas buffet i've actually eaten until my stomach hurt after. :( that was stupid and i don't intend to do it again. tho, coincidentally, i usually have to poo midway thru a long meal. and always after eating a big meal, within the hour!
interesting article! and so many interesting factoids i'll list them here!
“Given a choice between…their absolute favorite food or…a choice from a buffet of options, capuchin monkeys will opt for variety.” ... people ate almost 43 percent more M&Ms when there were 10 versus seven colors of candy in the bowl. In fact, the more options we have, the more us hungry, hungry hominids will eat in general, leading to the next point in buffet economics: the glutton factor."
"Other researchers have correlated the quantity of repeat trips one makes to a Chinese buffet with a set of traits, including body mass index, or BMI. While this conclusion—overweight people eat more—might seem obvious, the researchers also connect the quest for seconds and thirds with factors like plate size, how long one spends surveying their options before taking their initial serving, and whether the patron is seated facing, or turned away from, the steaming trays of lo, chow, and other various meins."
"People also may think they’re at buffets to eat a lot of cheap food, but according to science, the cheaper that buffet is, the less happy you’ll be... low prices at buffets leave people feeling less satisfied. That’s right, paying more for one’s food is a kind of self-fulfilling prophecy, also tied to our sense of value."
"Eat at pricier buffets with as many options as possible, in order to maximize your own satisfaction and the appeal of the meal you’re taking on. Use a large plate, and sit facing the buffet. By doing these things, you increase your chances of actually “beating the house”
me? i don't like buffets (according to the author, this is because i'm apparently a jerk!) because i can never eat even close to the charged amount. therefore, i prefer breakfast buffets. because i don't generally fill up on bread items like waffles, pancakes, toast (i prefer meats) and i LOVE berries, which are expensive.
my usual modus operandi at a buffet is to hit up every station, but one at a time. unless i know i won't like something i take a little bit of every item and go back to my table to try it all out. this way, if it turns out i don't like something and don't want to finish it, i waste very little. after finishing my samples from that station, i go back and get the items i like. if i didn't like much, i move onto the next station and repeat the process. i always try fill my plate and generally eat everything on it. i start with salad and finish with dessert. sometimes i try the soup, but not usually since i find most soups rather salty, and besides, they take up valuable stomach space. or, if i'm interested in the soups. i'll fill up on the main courses first then move back to soups. i also generally do not try to "over" eat on the expensive items. i like what i like and i'm not going to eat food i don't like just to "make it worth my money."
usually, at home, i eat until i first feel full. then i'll finish my bowl. when eating out, if i can't finish what's on my plate, i'll generally eat half so i can take the rest home. i don't like taking home less than a meal. it seems wasteful. when at a buffet i always overeat, lol. another reason i hate buffets! but i tend to eat slowly so can actually eat way more than i normally do. i seem to have a very elastic stomach. a time or two, at a $40+ vegas buffet i've actually eaten until my stomach hurt after. :( that was stupid and i don't intend to do it again. tho, coincidentally, i usually have to poo midway thru a long meal. and always after eating a big meal, within the hour!
Thursday, January 15, 2015
snowpiercer
i watched snowpiercer, which was a really weird movie. i don't think i liked it. i'm not really gonna bother summarizing the movie cause i have a headache now. probably wondering from wtf i just watched. suffice to say that these peoples are on this train encircling the world. and this train won't / can't stop for nothing so it's a closed ecosystem. they grow their own food (they even have cow and chicken carcasses somehow...), somehow produce energy, and get a lot of the water from the snow outside, tho they do also recycle the water.
everything else aside, it had at least one major stupid (as if you didn't already think of several). a big part of the movie is that everyone has their place. we need an upper class, a working class, and a ... sheesh, not even lower class. but a class of destitutes. more than one time they talk about having to maintain a perfect balance, including, of course, how humans factor into it all. but why do they need a class of destitutes? like, what is even the point?
they apparently eat energy blocks made of bugs, so it's not like they eat regular food. but, like... there are fat destitutes. and there are a LOT of these destitutes. i mean, bugs have a lot of protein, and they procreate really quickly, but where do they get so many bugs to feed so many people?! and these people must still create a lot of waste. which they do what with? and more to the point. WHY?! the fuck is even the point of keeping these people around?
some of it might be a social thing. like, scare the other classes to stay in line or they'll be relegated to the lower class. but, like... why? if they fuck up that bad, just kick them off the train. duh. wouldn't that be way easier? this train even has a whole car of drug addicts sleeping it off in morgue-like box compartments. they also have another car of druggies just passed out on the floor. ...but... why?
part of the story is also that the conductor needs little kids to help run the engine. cause they're so small, see? and apparently the lower class breeds a lot. and i assume it would be inhuman or something to make rich kids work. that's not explained. but like... there are OLD destitutes. and a lot of non-procreating ones. basically, they got a lot of useless people back there. i mean, they do seem to do some manual labor, but not nearly enough to justify keeping them alive. furthermore, some of the destitutes, regular age and really old are handicapped. missing limbs. so they're probably not able to do a ton of work.
i dunno. it's all i could think during the movie. pretty sure that's why i have a massive headache right now. brain kept screaming "WHY?!"
everything else aside, it had at least one major stupid (as if you didn't already think of several). a big part of the movie is that everyone has their place. we need an upper class, a working class, and a ... sheesh, not even lower class. but a class of destitutes. more than one time they talk about having to maintain a perfect balance, including, of course, how humans factor into it all. but why do they need a class of destitutes? like, what is even the point?
they apparently eat energy blocks made of bugs, so it's not like they eat regular food. but, like... there are fat destitutes. and there are a LOT of these destitutes. i mean, bugs have a lot of protein, and they procreate really quickly, but where do they get so many bugs to feed so many people?! and these people must still create a lot of waste. which they do what with? and more to the point. WHY?! the fuck is even the point of keeping these people around?
some of it might be a social thing. like, scare the other classes to stay in line or they'll be relegated to the lower class. but, like... why? if they fuck up that bad, just kick them off the train. duh. wouldn't that be way easier? this train even has a whole car of drug addicts sleeping it off in morgue-like box compartments. they also have another car of druggies just passed out on the floor. ...but... why?
part of the story is also that the conductor needs little kids to help run the engine. cause they're so small, see? and apparently the lower class breeds a lot. and i assume it would be inhuman or something to make rich kids work. that's not explained. but like... there are OLD destitutes. and a lot of non-procreating ones. basically, they got a lot of useless people back there. i mean, they do seem to do some manual labor, but not nearly enough to justify keeping them alive. furthermore, some of the destitutes, regular age and really old are handicapped. missing limbs. so they're probably not able to do a ton of work.
i dunno. it's all i could think during the movie. pretty sure that's why i have a massive headache right now. brain kept screaming "WHY?!"
Friday, January 9, 2015
seating etiquette
the other day, rip and i were having dinner with a teammate of mine named lee. rip is not on this team, tho he has met a lot of them since he went with me to my team's year-end dinner. lee sat down first. rip was getting a drink, so i was to sit down next. and wouldn't you know it. i had no idea where to sit! we weren't in a booth; it was a long table with individual chairs. lee sat at the end, across from the side rip and i were to sit. so do i sit across from lee or have rip sit across from lee?
i ended up sitting across from lee. because i figure lee is my teammate, not rip's, so it would make more sense for me to sit across from him, rather than rip. but i wondered, because, well, i dunno. he's a guy, so i felt like i shouldn't sit across from him. lol, i have no idea. if it were just me and lee we would obviously sit across each other. if we were with the team i'd have rip sit across from lee so i'd be next to a teammate, because rip isn't on the team. but in this situation i, for some reason, thought it awkward to sit across from lee when i was with rip? ...i know, it sounds as if i'm cheating on rip with lee so i'm hella paranoid to "just act normal."
lol, anyway, i think i did fine. i think it was all *very normal*. hahahah. but seriously. have you ever randomly freaked out a little over seating? it's strange. like, i don't want to accidentally offend rip somehow by sitting across from some dude. tho if rip were to get offended by this, our relationship has some crazy problems. but, lol, turns out it's just me with the crazy problems.
i ended up sitting across from lee. because i figure lee is my teammate, not rip's, so it would make more sense for me to sit across from him, rather than rip. but i wondered, because, well, i dunno. he's a guy, so i felt like i shouldn't sit across from him. lol, i have no idea. if it were just me and lee we would obviously sit across each other. if we were with the team i'd have rip sit across from lee so i'd be next to a teammate, because rip isn't on the team. but in this situation i, for some reason, thought it awkward to sit across from lee when i was with rip? ...i know, it sounds as if i'm cheating on rip with lee so i'm hella paranoid to "just act normal."
lol, anyway, i think i did fine. i think it was all *very normal*. hahahah. but seriously. have you ever randomly freaked out a little over seating? it's strange. like, i don't want to accidentally offend rip somehow by sitting across from some dude. tho if rip were to get offended by this, our relationship has some crazy problems. but, lol, turns out it's just me with the crazy problems.
Saturday, January 3, 2015
tread lightly
quotations from eric blehm's the last season which is about randy morgenson, who "was legendary for finding people missing in the high sierra... then one day he went missing himself."
alden nash - it's hard to feel sorry for a man who's standing on his own weenie.
radny morgenson - "that a humanoid god willed all this into existence simply to glorify himself (a bit too egotistically human), and/or for us, his greatest creation, and our pleasure, use, misuse, seems not either to fit... I wish only to be alive and to experience this living to the fullest. to feel deeply about my days, to feel the goodness of life and the beauty of my world, this is my preference. i am human and experience the emotions of humanity: elation, frustration, loneliness, love. and the greatest of these is love, love for the world and its creatures, love for life. it comes easily here. i have loved a thousand mountain meadows and alpine peaks. to be thoroughly aware each day that i'm alive to be deeply sensitive to the world i inhabit and the world that i am, not to roam roughshod over the broad surface of this planet for achievement but to know where i step, and to tread lightly. i would rather my footsteps never be seen, and the sound of my voice be heard only by those near, and never echo, than leave in my wake the fame of those whom we commonly call great."
alden nash - it's hard to feel sorry for a man who's standing on his own weenie.
radny morgenson - "that a humanoid god willed all this into existence simply to glorify himself (a bit too egotistically human), and/or for us, his greatest creation, and our pleasure, use, misuse, seems not either to fit... I wish only to be alive and to experience this living to the fullest. to feel deeply about my days, to feel the goodness of life and the beauty of my world, this is my preference. i am human and experience the emotions of humanity: elation, frustration, loneliness, love. and the greatest of these is love, love for the world and its creatures, love for life. it comes easily here. i have loved a thousand mountain meadows and alpine peaks. to be thoroughly aware each day that i'm alive to be deeply sensitive to the world i inhabit and the world that i am, not to roam roughshod over the broad surface of this planet for achievement but to know where i step, and to tread lightly. i would rather my footsteps never be seen, and the sound of my voice be heard only by those near, and never echo, than leave in my wake the fame of those whom we commonly call great."
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)