two face

eyelash transplants. reepal has beautiful eyelashes. adam heller did too (you kno the boy had nice eyelashes if that's basically the only thing i remember about him, couldn't even remember his last name). i always thought it was terribly unfair for boys to have such long and curled lashes when society tells us it's the girls who should be well endowed. at any rate. i have sorta longish lashes. they don't curl tho. and they don't appear particularly long because they're mainly hidden by my single eyelid. so this surgery. do you think if i got it i could also get a double eyelid done at the same time? something to consider. (altho i don't see myself ever getting this type of cosmetic surgery).

i find it intriguing how people spend so much time on making themselves look good. i mean, i'm not entirely witout vanity. but i don't think anyone can call me vain. a while ago a friend i were talking about how we kno wat makes us look good, and yet we don't care enough to actually do it. i remember once going over to another friend's house and before going out, she curled her hair. i think that's amazing. wanting to constantly look good. i think i care most about my clothes. i sorta need to match. even when it comes to dragon boating. altho i don't go overboard wit that. i only need to match. one of the hs girls actually goes to the beach in heeled sandals. can you imagine? and i scoff at the girls who feel they need to wear makeup to the beach practices.

some entertainment show (extra or et or something) has a segment on 'ugly vanessa' where she first dolls up in a blond wig and does stuff. later she dresses down (fat suit, not so trendy clothes, unkempt hair, braces) and tries to do the same stuff. of course she's met wit different results. the tyra show did something similar. identical twins tho. one made pretty, one not so much. they went on job interviews. homely girl was way qualified. pretty girl totally not. guess who got offered the jobs?

each time the reporters were shocked at the results. but why? i thought it was established fact that attractive people get treated better. (tall people too. alfred told me of a study they did for women choosing men. the shorter men were well educated, good jobs, good hobbies and habits. tall men were, besides their height, not so outstanding. women overwhelmingly chose the taller man) and yet even knowing that, lots of people don't try much to make themselves more attractive. why is that?

my mom wants me to get double eyelid surgery. she tells me that it'll be easier for me to apply eye makeup. i tell her that if i were ever to get it (and i have a lot of reasons why i wouldn't, not wanting to conform to western standards of beauty being at the top of my list) it would probably be so that i would look prettier wit my conventional, larger, more opened eyes. because, as we already kno, attractive people get more benifits. so then why not just do it? it it's not something drastic (surgery), time consuming (blowing out your hair everyday), or expensive (professional teeth whitening) then why are we so anxious to hold ourselves back?

and since it really is the case that attractive people get treated better, then why are we so hard on those who put in a lot of effort? for those who have had multiple surgeries. maybe they don't have a mental problem. after all, they're only trying to be the best they can be. they're only trying to reap the rewards of being beautiful. it's not their fault they weren't born as naturally beautiful; they have to put in the extra effort. society rewards us for being beautiful. and why should we punish those who want to be rewarded? isn't that a bit backwards? they are living up to their full potential. the rest of us are just settling wit wat we have, wat we care to bother ourselves wit. maybe those people should be praised. "be all you can be" the army tells us. but at wat price? is there only so much beauty in a person? in order to enhance your beauty outside, must you give up the beauty on the inside?