making up

altho we've had a really good run recently. reep and i got into a fight earlier this weekend about him not wanting to involve me in his life but wanting me to involve him. understandably, i was a bit upset at this.

background: he sometimes gets annoyed if i don't invite him out wit my friends. not to those target runs me and the girls do nearly every weekend. but i don't think that inviting him is always appropriate. for instance to a class reunion of sorts. yes he went to our school. and yes he knows most of the people. but so wat? i'm not gonna show up at his class reunion just cause i kno a few people here and there. (btw, i politely invited him because he was already down the street from my house.) or. he wanted to go to someone else's party at their house. i was invited he wasn't. this host. he's a friend of mine. he and reepal... well, they kno each other.

so the other day reep asked if i wanted to go see silent hill. i said yes, but not so badly, so he could go wit his friends and not wait for me. later on he told me they were gonna see the movie the next day at 10pm. which, really, isn't that late for me. a lil late, but nothing so bad. i asked him wat he would've done if i had said that i wanted to go. he said that he'd not go wit his friends and would just go wit me. ...why can't i go wit your friends? he thinks it'd be awkward because they'll feel like they can't act normally around him. but i think that if he were to act normally around them when i'm there, then they'll get the hint and get normal too. another reason, more legit, is that i'd be the only girl and he thinks they would be uncomfortable wit that. i can totally see that. his friends are a bit... unacquainted wit the female sex. we argue on a bit. i mean, i don't want to go to every little thing him and his friends do. but a movie? wat's so bad about that? and how uncomfortable can it be? we're all not talking to each other and sitting in a darkend room paying attention a giant screen.

suddenly he says, no, excuse me, declares, that from this point on we shall separate our personal lives from each other. ..because this solves the problem? obviously this is ridiculous. i mean, wat's supposed to happen if we ever do get married? will we have two weddings? one for his friends and another for mine? and i won't be at that wedding for his friends, right? because we're supposed to keep things separate?

that day i was also supposed to print out something for his dad that reepal had forgotten to print the last time he was here (i get free printing, i just need to supply the paper). and this is like 250 some pages we're talking about. and i'm upset over this 'separate' business so i'm thinking like, then i shouldn't print it because that's his dad, not one of my own friends or anything. later i finally got a hold of ting and we talked things out and i did eventually print it out. because as ting pointed out, i would feel bad if i didn't. and for me. like... wat, i'm gonna let my own integrity suffer and inconvenience your dad because you're wrong about something? no way.

later on i show up at his place wanting to just drop off the stuff. i see him sitting in his chair and i knock. he's wearing his head phones tho so i ring the bell and the door then opens. it's his dad! that threw me off a bit (this being a friday middish afternoon). so i hand the stuff over to his dad and he tells me that reepal's home and starts to call him. i'm like 'oh, well, i gotta go so...' reepal's already up and walking towards the door. he asks if i wanna come in and play puzzle fighter. at this point i'm still a bit annoyed about the afternoon (towards the end of our phone convo we were having these silences. and then suddenly the phone hung up. and i thought it was reception. but i called back and he didn't pick up. so i left a message. which he never responded to. so i was wondering if perhaps he had hung up on me.) so i say that no i have to pee (i do) so i should get home. he closes his door and starts to walk me to my car. on the way there he reaches over for my hand. so i guess we've made up. i dunno. i can't stand being mad at people. i forgive rather easily. which i kno sounds actually not like something i do. but believe me, i do forgive easily. if you say sorry and mean it, or if you try to bury the hatchet most likely i'll accept right away. unless this is something you've tried to pull a couple times.

so we get to the car and guess wat? he asks me to the movie. aw... i declined anyway. i mean, i didn't really wanna see it that badly anyway. and i dunno why, but i feel like... seeing a horror movie wit his friends... i get very scared during movies and things. (i tend to over identify) and so i'll scrunch up in my seat and cover my eyes and jump and scream at things. so, lol, i didn't want to make a total fool of myself. but also, it was a friday night. and my rents don't like it if i go out too late. ..10pm for a movie isn't late. but afterwards they'd wanna go eat. and i hate hate hate it when after a movie wit his friends reep and i leave them (for watever reason). i feel like... they feel like i'm restricting reepal. as if i want us to leave early. but i don't! i want everyone to act normally. i want them to be normal around me. i want them to like me. and if they feel like i'm whisking reepal away right after the movie, they'll be less inclined to act normally around me, which in turn would make them not like me.

so reepal asked. and i said no, that's okay, thanked him, and said that i hadn't really wanted to go anyway. this exasperated him and i was like, i just wanted you to ask so i knew you wanted me to to. he tells me i'm ridiculous. i think he's not thinking about it from my standpoint. but anyway. we talked more about it tonight as i posted this. and he said that from now on, if they go do a movie thing he'll ask me. :)