Monday, October 31, 2005

chin up

so. a couple friends lately have been going thru some hard times. and... shiteness... i saw a friend of mine cry this weekend which was, to be perfectly selfish, pretty hard on me too. she's normally so strong. i've always thought of her as one of the toughest people i kno. and so it was bit of a shock to hear her say that she didn't kno how to be strong anymore and that she felt like she was so alone... ...i don't kno about you, but sometimes i find it really difficult knowing wat to say to people. when they need encouragement or some... kind words? or... damn i dunno. yeah... makes me feel really just useless sometimes. well anyway, no use spewing more useless words. public health notice: in case you feel like killing yourself, just fill the tub and be appeased wit mr suicide instead.

halloween

happy halloween homies! hope your night was sufficiently scary (damn, i kno i spelled that wrong. oh well. lol.) *tv's top 10 scariest characters. *be glad you've never played tekken against this dude. *james bond is gun shy. *and for a good laugh: pez mp3 player. :)

postsecret

new postsecret.

Thursday, October 27, 2005

super.. crazy?

in case you didn't kno, nicholas cage and his wife alice kim cage recently had their first child together, a baby boy. named: kal-el. ...yes, you read that right. kal-el, like from superman. his alien name. ... their reasoning?

"Alice and I wanted to have a name that was exotic and American and which stood for something good, because our son is exotic and he's American and we both think he's good. But having said that, I always liked the sound of the name. It has kind of a magical ring to it: Abracadabra Kal-El Shazam!"

(picture originally from here [yes i changed her hair color])

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

'counting sheep' - russell edson

A scientist has a test tube full of sheep. He
wonders if he should try to shrink a pasture
for them.
They are like grains of rice.
He wonders if it is possible to shrink something
out of existence.
He wonders if the sheep are aware of their tininess,
if they have any sense of scale. Perhaps they think
the test tube is a glass barn ...
He wonders what he should do with them; they
certainly have less meat and wool than ordinary
sheep. Has he reduced their commercial value?
He wonders if they could be used as a substitute
for rice, a sort of wolly rice . . .
He wonders if he shouldn't rub them into a red paste
between his fingers.
He wonders if they are breeding, or if any of them
have died.
He puts them under a microscope, and falls asleep
counting them . . .

Monday, October 24, 2005

redundant

Sometimes i think this cycle never ends
We slide from top to bottom and we turn and climb again
And it seems by the time that i have figured what it's worth
The squeaking of our skin against the steel has gotten worse.

But if i move my place in line i'll lose.
And i have waited, the anticipation's got me glued.

I am waiting for something to go wrong.
I am waiting for familiar resolve.

Sometimes it seems that i don't have the skills to recollect
The twists and turns of plots that took us from lovers to friends
I'm thinking i should take that volume back up off the shelf
And crack it's weary spine and read to help remind myself

But if i move my place in line i'll lose.
And I have waited, the anticipation's got me glued.

I am waiting for something to wrong
I am waiting for familiar resolve
I am waiting for another repeat
Another diet fed by crippling defeat
And i am waiting for that sense of relief
I am waiting for you to flee the scene
As if you held in your hand the smoking gun
And on the floor lay the one you said you loved.

And it's strange
They are basically the same
So i don't ask names anymore.

Sometimes i think this cycle never ends
We slide from top to bottom and we turn and climb again
And it seems by the time that i have figured what it's worth
The squeaking of our skin against the steel has gotten worse.

The squeaking of our skin against the steel has gotten worse

The squeaking of our skin against the steel has gotten worse

The squeaking of our skin against the steel has gotten worse

shiteness

last week was basically the best week reep and i have had in a long time. and no this feeling isn't just one sided, he said pretty much the same thing last night. but then yesterday i screwed things up. yeah, good job stephanie. i just... shit. i love him so much and yet i can't seem to stop f*cking things up wit him. that's not normal is it? anyway, right now things are sorta... up in the air? he asked earlier if this is how i want our relationship to be. obviously no. but it's not that easy is it? it's not just a simple renovation our relationship calls for. we'd have to start over. from the foundation even. ...shite. ...do you kno that whenever i make a wish regarding our relatoinship on a star i wish that 'everything works out for the best' or that 'we're both happy'. it's not 'i wish that reepal and i would get over this fight' or 'i wish reepal and i would make up'. last night one of my roomates asked if i was happy. and i replied that i was, until that night, cause the week before had been something close to perfect. and she asked if i had noticed that i always quantify my happiness. this month, last week, right now... when will i unequivically just be able to say yes?

'it's the same thing again' 'it's a feeling i’ve had many times before: i struggle and sweat when i'm wide awake' / 'my fault is it? now well, that's news to me' / 'and you blast off in another rant' 'i've not opened my mouth; can you read my mind so easily?' / 'curled and joyless we try once again'

names

From "The Best Baby Name Book in the Whole Wild World" by Bruce Lansky  

"Ann Landers wrote about a couple who has six children, all named Eugene Jerome Dupuis, Junior. The children answer to One, Two, Three, Four, Five, and Six, respectively!"  

"Tonsilitis Jackson has brothers and sisters named Meningitis, Appendicitis, and Peritonitis."  

"A couple in Louisiana named their children after colleges: Stanford, Duke, T'Lane, Harvard, Princeton, Auburn and Cornell. The parents' names? Stanford, Sr., and Loyola."  

"In 1979, the Pennsylvania Health Department discovered these two first names among the 159,000 birth certificates issued in the state that year - Pepsi and Cola."  

"Zachary Zzzzra has been listed in the Guinness Book of World Records as making 'the most determined attempt to be the last personal name in a local telephone directory' in San Francisco."  

"One family which was not terribly successful in limiting its expansion has a series of children called, respectively, Finis, Addenda, Appendix, Supplement and Errata." 

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

uglies

trump is at it again. not happy wit just having the ugliest haircut in the world, he must now also build the ugliest building. it's a good thing money can buy you averything, even good taste. ...wait, wat? *revenge is a dish... pate anyone? *peeing toms in peeping jons. (thanks blabert for the link!) *and i'm not sure if this is real or not, but appt you can buy real bodies and body parts, online?

convo etc

TggrPoUnCe [2:20 A.M.]:  just hope that your future husband/partner/sex toy doesn't have ay stds
Neurp [2:20 A.M.]:  seriously
TggrPoUnCe [2:21 A.M.]:  OR by then they'll invent something to cure or reverse the effects
TggrPoUnCe [2:21 A.M.]:  that would be freaking awesome
Neurp [2:21 A.M.]:  we gonna sign that prenup after we get the results back from our tests

 TggrPoUnCe [2:21 A.M.]:  ...
TggrPoUnCe [2:21 A.M.]:  hey b4 u get married don't u usually take a drug test?
Neurp [2:21 A.M.]:  blood test i think
TggrPoUnCe [2:21 A.M.]:  like see  if u have aids, blood conditions, etc
Neurp [2:21 A.M.]:  screens for aids. yeah
TggrPoUnCe [2:22 A.M.]:  that's crazy. what if you'll all ready to get married and then u find out your partner has some rare blood disease  or aids
TggrPoUnCe [2:22 A.M.]:  would u still marry them?
Neurp [2:22 A.M.]:  yeah
TggrPoUnCe [2:22 A.M.]:  coo
Neurp [2:22 A.M.]:  condoms all the way tho
Neurp [2:22 A.M.]:  no kids neither
TggrPoUnCe [2:22 A.M.]:  that can't prevent stds all the way
TggrPoUnCe [2:22 A.M.]:  wht if u really wanted kids
Neurp [2:22 A.M.]:  but we can adopt. lord knows we got enough parentless kids
TggrPoUnCe [2:22 A.M.]:  u'd give it up for your husband?
TggrPoUnCe [2:23 A.M.]:  yeah serious
Neurp [2:23 A.M.]:  i think so. 
TggrPoUnCe [2:23 A.M.]:  aw you're sweet
Neurp [2:23 A.M.]:  eh. i always thought marriage should be forever, you kno?
TggrPoUnCe [2:23 A.M.]:  i want a wife like you!
Neurp [2:23 A.M.]:  aw...
TggrPoUnCe [2:23 A.M.]:  ya me too
Neurp [2:23 A.M.]:  will you marry me!
TggrPoUnCe [2:23 A.M.]:  aww.. yes! of course!
Neurp [2:23 A.M.]:  yay!
TggrPoUnCe [2:23 A.M.]:  i don't have stds!
Neurp [2:23 A.M.]:  hold on... imma go break up wit reepal
TggrPoUnCe [2:24 A.M.]:  riiite
Neurp [2:24 A.M.]:  lol
TggrPoUnCe [2:25 A.M.]:  dude.. i need to sleep no
Neurp [2:25 A.M.]:  aight. i need to go stretch my back
TggrPoUnCe [2:25 A.M.]:  you guys have somethign stable
TggrPoUnCe [2:25 A.M.]:  ttyl dude
Neurp [2:25 A.M.]:  aight.
TggrPoUnCe [2:25 A.M.]:  love ya baby
Neurp [2:25 A.M.]:  g'night sweetie
TggrPoUnCe [2:26 A.M.]:  goodnight my fiancee
TggrPoUnCe signed off at 2:26 A.M.

convo cont

TggrPoUnCe [2:16 A.M.]:  yeah.. wow we sound like a bunch of old bitter melons
Neurp [2:16 A.M.]:  my god we do...
Neurp [2:16 A.M.]:  i dunno.
Neurp [2:16 A.M.]:  kids these days tho... they're all messed up
TggrPoUnCe [2:16 A.M.]:  seriously.. our generation was so much better
TggrPoUnCe [2:17 A.M.]:  and not so reliant on mtv and the net..
TggrPoUnCe [2:17 A.M.]:  we did our researchold skoo back then
Neurp [2:17 A.M.]:  don't have their priorities straight. rather than run around in the sun they like to sit there and trade stupid cards.
TggrPoUnCe [2:17 A.M.]:  i know!

 Neurp [2:17 A.M.]:  hell yeah. library, you kno? card catalogue!
TggrPoUnCe [2:17 A.M.]:  yeah.. and they actually use librarians
Neurp [2:17 A.M.]:  ain't got no crazy 'in-ter-net' thing!
TggrPoUnCe [2:17 A.M.]:  hehe.. you're funny when you're old
Neurp [2:17 A.M.]:  lazy asses. no wonder kids getting so fat these days.
TggrPoUnCe [2:18 A.M.]:  is this what i'll be like when i turn 22?
Neurp [2:18 A.M.]:  honey, you already bitching wit me.
TggrPoUnCe [2:18 A.M.]:  yeah.. all the ydo is sit on the net
Neurp [2:18 A.M.]:  i think you're there
Neurp [2:18 A.M.]:  and give oral sex!
TggrPoUnCe [2:18 A.M.]:  yeah. i am. i just don't want to admit the fact that we're getting into our twenties.
TggrPoUnCe [2:18 A.M.]:  wtf???
Neurp [2:18 A.M.]:  kids.
TggrPoUnCe [2:18 A.M.]:  oh
Neurp [2:18 A.M.]:  they give each other oral sex
TggrPoUnCe [2:18 A.M.]:  i thought u were telling me.
TggrPoUnCe [2:18 A.M.]:  yeah.. they do!
Neurp [2:18 A.M.]:  it's wat expected now after french kissing.
TggrPoUnCe [2:18 A.M.]:  lil kids
TggrPoUnCe [2:18 A.M.]:  like 10
Neurp [2:19 A.M.]:  seriously

 TggrPoUnCe [2:19 A.M.]:  i'm freaking out
TggrPoUnCe [2:19 A.M.]: 
hs, whatever
TggrPoUnCe [2:19 A.M.]: 
but elementary kids?!
Neurp [2:19 A.M.]: 
i kno!
Neurp [2:19 A.M.]:  and cause of the hormones in milk and beef these days little girls are getting their periods earlier and earlier
TggrPoUnCe [2:19 A.M.]:  no offense kidies but i hope u all get herpes from each other
Neurp [2:19 A.M.]: 
pretty soon we'll really have kids having kids. 
TggrPoUnCe [2:20 A.M.]:  that'll be the end of our existence as humans
TggrPoUnCe [2:20 A.M.]: 
we're gunna kill ourselves off with pollution, wars, drugs, and stds
TggrPoUnCe [2:20 A.M.]: 
forget suicide, you won't even need it
Neurp [2:20 A.M.]: 
eh, but us oldie goldies will have died by then. so who cares about those damn kids and their herpies
TggrPoUnCe [2:20 A.M.]:  yop

convo wit tsai

TggrPoUnCe [2:04 A.M.]:  isn't this past yo bedtime young lady? ;)
TggrPoUnCe [2:05 A.M.]:  or should i say old lady
Neurp [2:05 A.M.]:  i ought to cut a switch for you!
Neurp [2:05 A.M.]:  you calling me old...
Neurp [2:05 A.M.]:  the nerve of these young people!
TggrPoUnCe [2:05 A.M.]:  haha.. yeah.. granny step.
Neurp [2:05 A.M.]:  you better recognize!
TggrPoUnCe [2:06 A.M.]:  that's what people will call you when your old.. that decrepit old grann
Neurp [2:06 A.M.]:  seriously tho, wat're you doing up?
Neurp [2:06 A.M.]:  i'm writing an essay. bleh
TggrPoUnCe [2:06 A.M.]:  erm.. trying to finish research for my paper.
TggrPoUnCe [2:06 A.M.]:  yeah.. i havent even started mine and its 15 pgs
Neurp [2:06 A.M.]:  when is it due?

 TggrPoUnCe [2:06 A.M.]:  thurs
Neurp [2:06 A.M.]:  :)  cool
TggrPoUnCe [2:06 A.M.]:  i'd be freaking out if it was tomorrow morning
Neurp [2:06 A.M.]:  i kind of just started my 12 page paper, also due thursday.
TggrPoUnCe [2:07 A.M.]:  oy.
TggrPoUnCe [2:07 A.M.]:  interesting?
TggrPoUnCe [2:07 A.M.]:  or wanna pull yo pubic hair out bad?
Neurp [2:07 A.M.]:  yeah, kind of. don't totally kno wat i'm doing. but it's okay
Neurp [2:07 A.M.]:  wat?!
Neurp [2:07 A.M.]:  oh my god... you are weird...
TggrPoUnCe [2:07 A.M.]:  yeah
TggrPoUnCe [2:07 A.M.]:  its late
TggrPoUnCe [2:07 A.M.]:  but i am weird

 TggrPoUnCe [2:08 A.M.]:  its just anew dimension on the old phrase wanna pull your hair out.
TggrPoUnCe [2:08 A.M.]:  pubic hair is just.. more intimate and .. probably hurts more
TggrPoUnCe [2:08 A.M.]:  wow.. i need to sleep.l
Neurp [2:08 A.M.]:  yes... yes i'd sure say you do
TggrPoUnCe [2:09 A.M.]:  ok steppo. imma crash then..
TggrPoUnCe [2:09 A.M.]:  take care of your old self.
Neurp [2:09 A.M.]:  i will
Neurp [2:10 A.M.]:  you too, don't wanna end up like old granny me
TggrPoUnCe [2:10 A.M.]:  hehe yeah..
Neurp [2:10 A.M.]:  take your vitamins!
TggrPoUnCe [2:10 A.M.]:  you to!
Neurp [2:10 A.M.]:  yea yeah...
Neurp [2:10 A.M.]:  you better watch yo mouth little girl! don't be comingup in here telling me wat to do
TggrPoUnCe [2:10 A.M.]:  wat are you yea yeahing about?
Neurp [2:10 A.M.]:  i'm older than you!
TggrPoUnCe [2:11 A.M.]:  wow. you ARE a crochety old person
Neurp [2:11 A.M.]:  lol

 TggrPoUnCe [2:11 A.M.]:  can't imagine what you'll be like later
Neurp [2:11 A.M.]:  wiser
TggrPoUnCe [2:11 A.M.]:  hahaha..
TggrPoUnCe [2:12 A.M.]:  and of course more beautiful
Neurp [2:12 A.M.]:  well duh
TggrPoUnCe [2:12 A.M.]:  yo like a fyne wine.. with age comes beauty
Neurp [2:12 A.M.]:  didn't feel the need to mention that cos it's so obvious
Neurp [2:12 A.M.]:  and smell
TggrPoUnCe [2:12 A.M.]:  ;) and yes, you smell
TggrPoUnCe [2:12 A.M.]:  yo stank gets worse
TggrPoUnCe [2:12 A.M.]:  old people realy do smell.
Neurp [2:12 A.M.]:  well, as long as i pull out my pubic hair it's okay if i smell
TggrPoUnCe [2:12 A.M.]:  at least the chinese ones…
TggrPoUnCe [2:13 A.M.]:  ...
TggrPoUnCe [2:13 A.M.]:  yeah now reading that from your end,that does sound weird.
Neurp [2:13 A.M.]:  told you!  silly annie

 TggrPoUnCe [2:13 A.M.]:  i dunno.. it just came to mind.
Neurp [2:13 A.M.]:  lol.  it was funny tho
TggrPoUnCe [2:13 A.M.]:  silly step

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

random convo

Neurp [1:58 A.M.]:  of course, hope is my savior

Neurp [2:03 A.M.]:  but ask any religious person, and there is no difference between 'knowing' and 'faith'
-------- [2:04 A.M.]:  because for most people believing and knowing must be one thing
-------- [2:05 A.M.]:  well, for all people
-------- [2:05 A.M.]:  when it comes down to the ultimate decision, you either believe what you know or make "fact" what you believe in your head
Neurp [2:09 A.M.]:  i believe that i exist tho, more than i believe anything else
-------- [2:10 A.M.]:  knowing is simply one's assurance of belief
-------- [2:13 A.M.]:  its like wiping away at your glasses so hard to get a clearer view
-------- [2:13 A.M.]:  that you wear it down to nothing
-------- [2:13 A.M.]:  and you cant see at all

Neurp [2:25 A.M.]:  it's a real downer, thinking.

Monday, October 17, 2005

...?

You're Special, REEPAL
There is a fine fellow we know
In Ahmedabad you live and that's so
You've a beautiful body
Your torso's not shoddy

You're gentle and kind
The best one could find
You know when to be quite forgiving
This greeting is very sincere
We really do wish you were here
We send our HELLO !
From People Of World, you know

It's you, REEPAL, we know, read below
A trustworthy person we know
Sincere from your head to your toe

You're honest and swell
The truth you will tell
And say just the facts of what's so
You're not just like one of the rest
You're certainly one of the best

You're special for reasons
That last through the seasons
With you we are really impressed

You're perfect and right
From morning 'till night
It's you, Reepal, we'll tell of your ways
Outsiders soon join in the throng
The minute that you come along

Your warm friendly style
Shines right through your smile
You love to help people belong
Our message to you is now this
"You Are Dynamic" is our whole emphasis
Since now is the time
To end this short rhyme
Tho to say "You Are Honest & Trustworthy"

You seem almost fearless
Your courage is peerless
It's you, Reepal, we'll tell of your ways
Uniquely you take time for giving
It shows in the way that you're living

Now more about you we will hear
You're known for such lively ambition
With you this is quite a tradition
You've no fear of hard work
When we'd go beserk
To strive 'til you win is your mission
Graduation is finally here
A special event of the year
This milestone you've earned
For all you have learned
You now face a brand new frontier
The Earnest People

 

http://members.fortunecity.com/reepalshah/poem.htm

Thursday, October 13, 2005

photobooth

osamu dazai - "the setting sun"

"Scoundrels like Naoji simply don't die. The ones who die are always the gentle, sweet, and beautiful people. Naoji wouldn't die even if you clubbed him with a stick." (pg 10)

Learning is another name for vanity. It is the effort of human beings not to be human beings." (63)

"''People always make a serious face when they tell a lie. The seriousness of our leaders these days! Pooh!" (66)

"When I pretended to be precocious, people started the rumor that I was precocious. When I acted like an idler, rumor had it I i was an idler. When I pretended I couldn't write a novel, people said I couldn't write. When I acted like a liar, they called me a liar. When I acted like a rich man, they started the rumor that I was rich. When I feigned indifference, they classed me as the indifferent type. But when I inadvertently groaned because I was really in pain, they started the rumor that I was faking suffering. The world is out of joint." (66-67)

-book translated by donald keene

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

egress

i felt like changing my aol password (btw he changed his and he didn’t tell me his new one. if i were him i’d be quick to ask ‘wat are you hiding in your email?’ but oh well…) today because i feel like he reads my mail not out of curiosity but to check up on me. he denies this. he may be right. and yet… he never says anything like ‘oh that thing in your mail was funny’. it’s always accusatory. it always leads to questions like: ‘why didn’t you tell me about this?’ or ‘wat else are you hiding?’ i don’t like the constant scrutiny. yet i remember that post of his awhile ago: “and people like stephanie, don't have it in them to want to do the things that gain trust.” oh is that all it is? … now, most of the time, i don’t even bother defending myself. it’s too much effort for no progress at all. he’s constantly mad at me for things that i didn’t do. he gets an idea in his head. and sticks to it. he makes up his mind before hearing all the facts. and i hate that. if you kno me at all, you should kno that. …he doesn’t ask questions. oh wait, he does actually. but the questions he asks… “wat else are you still lying about?” “wat do you kno that you’re not telling me?” it’s a lose / lose situation. wat’s the point of telling you wat happened if you’re not going to believe it anyway? if you never give me any leeway? if you only look for the inconsistencies. whether they are there or not. ‘even the devil can cite scripture for his purpose.’ besides which, the times i tell you the truth, that you kno, you don’t give me credit for. so wat if last night i had let you come to the car wit me, to wait for tsai to show up? to show you that i wasn’t lying. wat would that prove to you? that i was telling the truth that once. just that once. but it really makes no difference, does it? cause all other times that i can’t outright prove that i’m telling the truth means that i’m automatically lying. because the times i tell the truth, they are the exceptions to the rule. because i am always lying. because i am always hiding something. no matter wat a stupid lie it would be to say that tsai drove down from la to see me for the afternoon. then went and drove wit me to irvine so that i needn’t walk the two miles to my place because i wouldn’t ask james for a ride because i knew how much it would bother you. no matter that make the whole thing more ‘believable’ i’d only need to flip tsai to chang, who practically lives in irvine anyway.

 

things are unbelievably stinted between us. how does one act natural when living in an unnatural environment? we’re both trying tho. i went to his tekken tourney on friday. he stayed over wednesday night. we aren’t really saying ‘i love you’ anymore. not wanting to inadvertently lie i guess… we try to carry on as tho things aren’t as wrong as they are. but we kno better. we normally get along pretty well. but then someone says something. the scene changes. and quite suddenly we’re on opposite sides.

 

i was wit chang the other week, catching up and watnot. she was talking about a couple of her other friends. things they went thru. the things other people said to them, lies, to hurt them. i don’t do that. i don’t lie to hurt others. even wit the truth: i make sure that it really is the truth. something i really do want to say. the other night he said possibly the worst thing a partner can say to another: “most of the time you make me unhappy.” later he said tried to retrieve that sentence, but the damage had been done. even thoughtlessly, how can one say that to another who loves you, who cares for you, who tries for you? to think, wat if it were true? wat have we been doing all this time? wat have we been trying for? wat have i been trying for? i’ve been saying to him a lot lately: “i can’t do anything right.” and that really is just how i feel about him right now. that i can’t do anything right. nothing is good enough. and appt none of it was enough in the first place. anyway, recently i wrote something. something i think might be the truth but i’m not totally sure. and appt he caught it. and it hurt him. and while i’m sorry for having said it when i wasn’t totally sure if it was true or not. i’m more sorry that i think it is. …and if it is true. it is only because you helped make it so.

 

btw. when you start questioning why someone is wearing wat they’re wearing even tho they’ve worn the same thing before in all innocence, it really has gone too far.

 

'i swear i didn't mean for it to feel like this: 'like every inch of me is bruised'

'so keep it steady, now 'cause every inch you see is bruised'

post secret

new postsecret.

harhar!

1. Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.

2. A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything."

3. Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted. 

4. A dyslexic man walks into a bra...

5. A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says: "A beer please, and one for the road." 

6. Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other:  "Does this taste funny to you?"

7. "Doc, I can't stop singing 'The Green, Green Grass of Home.'" "That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome." "Is it common?" " Well, It's Not Unusual."

8. Two cows are standing next to each other in a field. Daisy says to Dolly, "I was artificially inseminated this morning." "I don't believe you," says Dolly. "It's true, no bull!" exclaims Daisy.

9. An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.

10. Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.

11. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.

12. A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He shouted, "Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The doctor replied, "I know you can't - ! I've cut off your arms!"

13. I went to a seafood disco last week...and pulled a mussel.

14. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.

15. Two termites walk into a bar. One asks, "Is the bar tender here?"

Monday, October 10, 2005

legislature

California: Detonating a nuclear device within the city limits results in a $500 fine.  

Illinois, Champaign: One may not pee in his neighbor's mouth.  

Florida: Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal.  

Alaska: It is considered an offense to push a live moose out of a moving airplane.  

Arizona: You may not have more than two dildos in a house.  
  
Illinois, Chicago: Law forbids eating in a place that is on fire.  

New York: The penalty for jumping off a building is death.  

Florida: It is considered an offense to shower naked.  

Maryland, Baltimore : It's illegal to take a lion to the movies.  

Texas: A recently passed anticrime law requires criminals to give their victims 24 hours notice, either orally or in writing, and to explain the nature of the crime to be committed.  

California, San Francisco: It is illegal to wipe one's car with used underwear. 

summer summery

TEN Things You Did;
1. went to china
2. taught english to kids
3. went to karaoke
4. rode an overnight train
5. rode a tandem bike 8 km
6. went semi halfway up a mountain on a rickshaw
7. hiked the great wall
8. got a pedicure that involved no nail polish
9. rode the maglev (432 km per hour!)
10. had the best damn time of my life


NINE Favorite Bands/Singers of the Summer;

(so not even enough...)
1. hometown hero (under the influence of giants) - mama's room
2. anberlin - paperthin hymn
3. 30 seconds to mars - i'll attack
4. acceptance - take cover
5. death cab for cutie - tiny vessels
6. name taken - cover up
7. fall out boy - nobody puts baby in the corner (acoustic)
8. rise against - like the angel
9. beatles - hello goodbye (theme song of the summer)

EIGHT Places You Ate At;
1. muslim quarter

2. louwailou in guilin

3. some place in beijing where i had the most awesome peking duck
4. restaurant in terracotta warrior museum where i had 'knife skinned noodles'
5. some dumpling place in xian where i had like 20 kinds of dumplings
6. bell tower hotel which was the first time i had cheese in china
7. hot pot place near xian where we had 'hand pulled noodles' and goose hotpot
8. random restaurant in chengdu where we ate godknowswhat

SEVEN Things that Annoyed You;
1. damn chinese weather
2. not enough luggage room

3. heartbreak extension overseas
4. not enough cds too many dvds
5. damn phonecards!
6. mom being proud of 'good looks' and not actual accomplishments

7. lack of cd burners

SIX Things You Bought;
1. 3 name chops
2. ugly ass postcards

3. 3 quipoas (lol)
4. 5 pairs of shoes
5. too many little religious figures
6. terracotta soldiers

FIVE Things You Accomplished;
1. taught
2. dealt wit kids (and didn't kill any!)

3. got better at chinese
4. traveled by myself
5. learned quite a bit about tea

FOUR Movies You Saw;
1. sahara (on plane)
2. miss congeniality 2 (on plane)
3. wicker park (hotel)
4. shark tale (school, for the kids!)


THREE Things You Wish You Did;
1. climbed the giant buddha at leshan
2. wrote more

3. took more pictures

TWO Rules You Broke;
1. bought pirated cds and dvds
2. jaywalking (lol...)

ONE Thing You LOVED About This Summer;
1. CHINA!!!

allen ginsberg - song

The weight of the world

     is love.

Under the burden

     of solitude,

under the burden

     of dissatisfaction

 

     the weight,

the weight we carry

     is love.

 

Who can deny?

     In dreams

it touches

     the body,

in thought

     constructs

a miracle,

     in imagination

anguishes

     till born

in human--

looks out of the heart

     burning with purity--

for the burden of life

     is love,

 

but we carry the weight

     wearily,

and so must rest

in the arms of love

     at last,

must rest in the arms

     of love.

 

No rest

     without love,

no sleep

     without dreams

of love--

     be mad or chill

obsessed with angels

     or machines,

the final wish

     is love

--cannot be bitter,

     cannot deny,

cannot withhold

     if denied:

 

the weight is too heavy

 

     --must give

for no return

     as thought

is given

     in solitude

in all the excellence

     of its excess.

 

The warm bodies

     shine together

in the darkness,

     the hand moves

to the center

     of the flesh,

the skin trembles

     in happiness

and the soul comes

     joyful to the eye--

 

yes, yes,

     that's what

I wanted,

     I always wanted,

I always wanted,

     to return

to the body

     where I was born.

Friday, October 7, 2005

lyrics

death cab for cutie - i will follow you into the dark


Love of mine, some day you will die
But I'll be close behind
I'll follow you into the dark

No blinding light or tunnels to gates of white
Just our hands clasped so tight
Waiting for the hint of a spark

If heaven and hell decide
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the no's on their vacancy signs
If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark

In Catholic school as vicious as Roman rule
I got my knuckles bruised by a lady in black
And I held my tongue as she told me
"Son fear is the heart of love"
So I never went back

If heaven and hell decide
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the no's on their vacancy signs
If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark

You and me have seen everything to see
From Bangkok to Calgary
And the soles of your shoes are all worn down
The time for sleep is now
It's nothing to cry about
Cause we'll hold each other soon
The blackest of rooms

If heaven and hell decide
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the no's on their vacancy signs
If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark
Then I'll follow you into the dark

Thursday, October 6, 2005

harryette mullen - why you and i

Who knows why you and I fell off the roster?

Who can figure why you and I never passed muster

on our way out yonder?

Does anyone wonder why you and I lacked

the presence of minding our blunders?

Can anyone see why you and I, no longer intact,

pulled a disappearing act and left with scratch? Our secret pact

required that you and I forget why and where

we lost our place when we went off the books.

Could anyone guess, does anyone know or even care

why you and I can’t be found, as hard as we look?

Who’ll spell out for us, if we exist,

why you and I missed our turn on the list?

who can stand no reason why you and I let

our union dissolve to strike the orderly alphabet?

Wednesday, October 5, 2005

levitation? (2)

            regroup

Rip N La [12:46 A.M.]:  so you think 50% is too high based on these pictures?
Neurp [12:46 A.M.]:  that wat? i'm a retard? um yeah, way too high
Rip N La [12:47 A.M.]:  how does this affect you being a retard?
Neurp [12:47 A.M.]:   Rip N La [12:38 A.M.]:  .... I'm not retarded.
Neurp [12:38 A.M.]:
  then do you think i am?
Rip N La [12:38 A.M.]:
  i say its 50/50
Rip N La [12:48 A.M.]:  when i said its 50/50 i was referring to the odds of whether you were actually reaching for the bottle or soemthing else
Rip N La [12:48 A.M.]:  when you asked if i thought you were, i thought you were referring to me thinking that you were reaching for the bottle
Neurp [12:49 A.M.]:  okay

Neurp [12:49 A.M.]:  and yeah, i do think it's a bit high
Neurp [12:49 A.M.]:  based on wat you said. 
Neurp [12:49 A.M.]:  it's like you're... seeing it the way you want to see it so that it'll help your case
Rip N La [12:50 A.M.]:  do you see that the extension of your arm matches the distance you'd need to be to be holding onto the closer bottle?
Neurp [12:51 A.M.]:  the closer one being the one to the left?
Neurp [12:51 A.M.]:  either way, no i don't. i think the left bottle is too far. the right bottle is too close.
Rip N La [12:52 A.M.]:  the left is definitely too far
Rip N La [12:52 A.M.]:  if your hand is actually holding the bottle though isnt the right one perfect?
Neurp [12:53 A.M.]:  i actually dont' think so. i do think that it looks too close.
Rip N La [12:53 A.M.]:  and if one isnt yours, do you remember whose bottles those were then?
Neurp [12:53 A.M.]:  of course not
Neurp [12:53 A.M.]:  and i don't kno if they were anyone's
Rip N La [12:53 A.M.]:  does vic drink?
Neurp [12:53 A.M.]:  everyone does
Neurp [12:54 A.M.]:  look at all the bottles in front of matt. he didn't drink all those
Rip N La [12:54 A.M.]:  it was his birthday..
Neurp [12:54 A.M.]:  and because it was karaoke people were constantly moving around the room.
Neurp [12:54 A.M.]:  so just cause it's in front of a person does not mean it's theirs
Neurp [12:54 A.M.]:  and they always get beer in bulk because it's cheaper

regroup
Rip N La [12:57 A.M.]:  k